oad should push a pen,
The fellow at a desk should tote a grip.

We never shall be happy, truly glad,
We never shall be really comforted,
Until we trade the job we've always had
And get the other fellow's job instead.

I see no other way to do--unless
We might do this: Forget a little while
The easy jobs that other men possess,
Get busy with your own, and with a smile.

For after all, they're not so different:
Each has its time of laughter and of sob,
But each the joy of service. Be content--
Your job's as good as any fellow's job.

MISTRESS (to butler)--"Why is it, John, every time I come home I find
you sleeping?"

"Well, ma'am, it's this way: I don't like to be a-doing _nothing_."

LAZY MIKE--"I have a new position with the railroad company."

WEARY RHODES--"What ja gona do?"

LAZY MIKE--"You know the fellow that goes alongside the train and taps
the axles to see if everything's all right? Well, I help him listen."

OCEAN TRAVEL

"Terribly rough, isn't it?" said the stranger on the ocean liner.

"Wal," replied the man from the farm, "'twouldn't be so rough if the
cap'n would only keep in the furrows!"

The storm was increasing in violence and some of the deck fittings
had already been swept overboard when the captain decided to send up a
signal of distress. But hardly had the rocket burst over the ship when
a solemn-faced passenger stepped on to the bridge. "Captain," he said,
"I'd be the last man on earth to cast a damper on any man, but it
seems to me that this is no time for letting off fireworks."

PASSENGER (after first night on board ship)--"I say, where have all my
clothes vanished to?"

STEWARD--"Where did you put them last night?"

PASSENGER--"I folded them up carefully and put them in that cupboard
over there."

STEWARD--"I see no cupboard, sir."

PASSENGER--"Are you blind, man? I mean that one with the round glass
door to it."

STEWARD--"Lor' bless me, sir; that ain't no cupboard. That's the
porthole."

OFFICE BOYS

Boss--"Can't you find something to do?"

OFFICE BOY--"Gee whiz: Am I expected to do the work and find it, too?"

A certain prominent lawyer of Toronto is in the habit of lecturing his
office staff from the junior partner down, and Tommy, the office boy,
comes in for his full share of the admonition. That his words were
appreciated was made evident to the lawyer by a conversation between
Tommy and