you sah," said Mr. Dickson, stropping a concave razor
on the palm of his hand, "it war just like dis. I jined the church in
good fait; I give ten dollars toward de stated gospill de fus' year,
and de church people call me 'Brudder Dickson'; the second year my
business not so good, and I gib only five dollars. Dat year the people
call me 'Mr. Dickson.' Dis razor hurt you, sah?"

"No, the razor goes tolerably well."

"Well, sah, the third year I feel berry poor; had sickness in my
family; and I didn't gib noffin' for preachin'. Well, sah, arter dat
dey call me 'dat old nigger Dickson'--and I left 'em."

CHURCH DISCIPLINE

Two Methodist preachers, one white and the other colored, served rural
charges in Mississippi which were conterminous. The negro received a
considerably larger salary than his white brother, who asked him if it
was not his custom to expel his members who failed to pay. "No, boss,"
he replied, "we would not like to put the gospel on a money basis. We
gets them to subscribe, and if they don't pay we turns them out for
lying."

CITIZENS

All the talk of hypenated citizenship has evidently had its effect
upon a San Francisco youngster, American born, who recently rebelled
fiercely when his Italian father whipped him for some misdemeanor.

"But, Tomaso," said one of the family, "your father has a right to
whip you when you are bad."

Tomaso's eyes flashed. "I am a citizen of the United States," he
declared. "Do you think that I am going to let any foreigner lick me?"

CITY AND COUNTRY

_See_ Country life.

CIVICS

Mrs. Profiteer was very proud of the stunts they were doing at the
smart private school to which she had sent her daughter.

"My dear," she said to her friend, "she's learning civics if you
please."

"What's civics?" asked the friend.

"Civics? My dear, don't you know? Why, it's the science of interfering
in public affairs."

CIVILIZATION

France says it is art.
England says it is conquest.
America says it is energy.
Italy says it is song.
Russia says it is work.
Japan says it is imitation.
Satan says it is his private "movie."

Nations, like individuals, live and die; but civilization cannot
die.--_Mazzini_.

The truest test of civilization is not the census, nor the size of
cities, nor the crops; no, but the kind of man the country turns
out.--_Emerson_.

CLASS DISTINCTIONS

Secretary Hoover said at