w reference-book--"Who's Whose."

SOLICITOR (whose client is thinking of getting a divorce)--"Well,
you can get it for about twenty pounds; everything done quietly and no
publicity."

CLIENT--"And how much will the real thing cost, with lots of publicity
and everything?"

WIFE (trying to think of The Hague)--"Let's see, what is the name of
the place where so much was done toward promoting peace in the world?"

HUB--"Reno, my dear."

"And are the divorce laws so very liberal in your section?"

"Liberal? Say! They are so liberal that nobody ever heard of a woman
crying at a wedding out there."

A divorce suit would not appeal so much to a jury if it was cleaned
before it was pressed.

"What are you cutting out of the paper?"

"An item about a California man securing a divorce because his wife
went through his pockets."

"What are you going to do with it?"

"Put it in my pocket."--_Everybody's_.

"Scotsman, married, desires change."--_Weekly Paper_.

We ought to warn him that the Divorce Court is very congested just
now.

To matrimonial speedsters, divorce is just a detour.

DOCTORS

"What is your greatest wish, Doctor, now that you have successfully
passed for your degree?"

YOUNG DOCTOR--"To put 'Dr.' before my own name, and 'Dr.' after the
name of other people."--_Life_.

"Who is your family doctor?"

"I can't tell you."

"Why not? Don't you know his name?"

"Yes. Dr. Johnson used to be our family doctor but nowadays mother
goes to an eye specialist; father to a stomach specialist; my sister
goes to a throat specialist; my brother is in the care of a lung
specialist, and I'm taking treatments from an osteopath."

A young suburban doctor whose practice was not very great sat in his
study reading away a lazy afternoon in early summer. His man servant
appeared at the door.

"Doctor, them boys is stealin' your green peaches again. Shall I chase
them away?"

The doctor looked thoughtful for a moment, then leveled his eyes at
the servant.

"No," he said.

Once an old darky visited a doctor and was given definite instructions
as to what he should do. Shaking his head he started to leave the
office, when the doctor said:

"Here, Rastus, you forgot to pay me."

"Pay yo for what, boss?"

"For my advice," replied the doctor.

"Naw, suh; naw, suh; I ain't gwine take it," and Rastus shuffled out.

M.D.--"Would you have the price if I said you needed an operati