t you stop and spell your names,
as I told you?"

"Y-yes; we did--but my name's Algernon Percival, an' his is
Jim!"--_Judge_.

FINANCE

"Dad," said little Reginald, "what is a bucket-shop?"

"A bucket-shop, my son," said the father, feelingly, "a bucket-shop
is a modern cooperage establishment to which a man takes a barrel and
brings back the bung-hole."--_Puck_.

"Dad," said the financier's son, running into his father's office,
"lend me six hundred."

"What for, my boy?"

"I've got a sure tip on the market."

"How much shall we make out of it?" asked the old man cautiously.

"A couple of hundred sure," replied the boy eagerly. "That's a hundred
each."

"Here's your hundred," said his father. "Let's consider that we have
made this deal and that it has succeeded. You make a hundred dollars
and I save five hundred."

_Higher Authority_

"Mr. Brown is outside," said the new office-boy. "Shall I show him
in?".

"Not on your life!" exclaimed the junior partner. "I owe him ten
dollars."

"Show him in," calmly said the senior member of the firm. "He owes me
twenty-five."

BUSINESS MAN (explaining)--"When they say 'money is easy,' they mean
simply that the supply is greater than the demand."

HIS WIFE--"Goodness! I shouldn't think such a thing possible."

SMITHSON--"Do you know that Noah was the greatest financier that ever
lived?"

DIBBS--"How do you make that out?"

SMITHSON--"Well, he was able to float a company when the whole world
was in liquidation."

"This car cost me thirty-five hundred dollars, Blathers, but I'll
let you have it for two thousand, eh? It's a clean gift of fifteen
hundred," said Bolivar. "Eh, what do you say?"

"No," said Blathers, "I can't do that; but suppose you give me five
hundred dollars and keep the car, eh? Clean saving of a thousand, eh?
What?"

The present financial situation gives the lie to the old adage that
Exchange is no robbery.

The man who had made a huge fortune was speaking a few words to a
number of students at a business class. Of course, the main theme of
his address was himself.

"All my success in life, all my tremendous financial prestige," he
said proudly, "I owe to one thing alone--pluck, pluck, pluck!"

He made an impressive pause here but the effect was ruined by one
student, who asked impressively:

"Yes, sir; but how are we to find the right people to pluck?"

A young New Haven man, returning home from a heal