ants that little long."

On the steamer the little bride was very much concerned about her
husband, who was troubled with dyspepsia.

"My husband is peculiarly liable to seasickness, Captain," remarked the
bride. "Could you tell him what to do in case of an attack?"

"That won't be necessary, Madam," replied the Captain; "he'll do it."

A clergyman who was holding a children's service at a Continental winter
resort had occasion to catechize his hearers on the parable, of the
unjust steward. "What is a steward?" he asked.

A little boy who had arrived from England a few days before held up his
hand. "He is a man, sir," he replied, with a reminiscent look on his
face, "who brings you a basin."

"The first day out was perfectly lovely," said the young lady just back
from abroad. "The water was as smooth as glass, and it was simply
gorgeous. But the second day was rough and--er--decidedly disgorgeous."

The great ocean liner rolled and pitched.

"Henry," faltered the young bride, "do you still love me?"

"More than ever, darling!" was Henry's fervent answer.

Then there was an eloquent silence.

"Henry," she gasped, turning her pale, ghastly face away, "I thought
that would make me feel better, but it doesn't!"

There was a young man from Ostend,
Who vowed he'd hold out to the end;
But when half way over
From Calais to Dover,
He did what he didn't intend.

SEASONS

There was a young fellow named Hall,
Who fell in the spring in the fall;
'Twould have been a sad thing
If he'd died in the spring,
But he didn't--he died in the fall.

SENATORS

A Senator is very often a man who has risen from obscurity to something
worse.

"You have been conspicuous in the halls of legislation, have you not?"
said the young woman who asks all sorts of questions.

"Yes, miss," answered Senator Sorghum, blandly; "I think I have
participated in some of the richest hauls that legislation ever made."

An aviator alighted on a field and said to a rather well-dressed
individual: "Here, mind my machine a minute, will you?"

"What?" the well-dressed individual snarled. "Me mind your machine? Why,
I'm a United States Senator!"

"Well, what of it?" said the aviator. "I'll trust you."

SENSE OF HUMOR

"What of his sense of humor?"
"Well, he has to see a joke twice before he sees it once."

--_Richard Kirk_.

"A sense of humor is a help and a blessin