eans a list of your descendants.

"The Complete Angler" was written by Euclid because he knew all about
angles.

The imperfect tense in French is used to express a future action in past
time which does not take place at all.

Arabia has many syphoons and very bad ones; It gets into your hair even
with your mouth shut.

The modern name for Gaul is vinegar.

Some of the West India Islands are subject to torpedoes.

The Crusaders were a wild and savage people until Peter the Hermit
preached to them.

On the low coast plains of Mexico yellow fever is very popular.

Louis XVI was gelatined during the French Revolution.

Gender shows whether a man is masculine, feminine, or neuter.

An angle is a triangle with only two sides.

Geometry teaches us how to bisex angels.

Gravitation is that which if there were none we should all fly away.

A vacuum is a large empty space where the Pope lives.

A deacon is the lowest kind of Christian.

Vapor is dried water.

The Salic law is that you must take everything with a grain of salt.

The Zodiac is the Zoo of the sky, where lions, goats and other animals
go after they are dead.

The Pharisees were people who like to show off their goodness by praying
in synonyms.

An abstract noun is something you can't see when you are looking at it.

EXCUSES

The children had been reminded that they must not appear at school the
following week without their application blanks properly filled out as
to names of parents, addresses, dates and place of birth. On Monday
morning Katie Barnes arrived, the tears streaming down her cheeks. "What
is the trouble?" Miss Green inquired, seeking to comfort her. "Oh,"
sobbed the little girl, "I forgot my excuse for being born."

O. Henry always retained the whimsical sense of humor which made him
quickly famous. Shortly before his death he called on the cashier of a
New York publishing house, after vainly writing several times for a
check which had been promised as an advance on his royalties.

"I'm sorry," explained the cashier, "but Mr. Blank, who signs the
checks, is laid up with a sprained ankle."

"But, my dear sir," expostulated the author, "does he sign them with his
feet?"

Strolling along the boardwalk at Atlantic City, Mr. Mulligan, the
wealthy retired contractor, dropped a quarter through a crack in the
planking. A friend came along a minute later and found him squatted
down, industriously poking a two dollar bi