ellow, "here have we been working for you
these six months, and cannot get one penny of money. Pray, sir, when do
you mean to pay us?"--"Very well, very well," said Sir Richard; "pray
come down; I have _heard_ quite enough; I cannot but own you speak very
distinctly, though I don't much _admire your subject_."

MCLXVIII.--SOLDIERS' WIVES.

THE late Duchess of York having desired her housekeeper to seek out a
new laundress, a decent-looking woman was recommended to the situation.
"But," said the housekeeper, "I am afraid she will not suit your royal
highness, as she is _a soldier's wife_, and these people are generally
_loose characters_!"--"What is it you say?" said the duke, who had just
entered the room, "_a soldier's wife_! Pray, madam, _what is your
mistress_? I desire that the woman may be immediately engaged."

MCLXIX.--NO JOKE.

A GENTLEMAN, finding his grounds trespassed on and robbed, set up a
board in a most conspicuous situation, to scare offenders, by the
notification that "Steel-traps and Spring-guns are set in these
Grounds";--but finding that even this was treated with contempt, he
caused to be painted, in very prominent letters, underneath,--"NO JOKE,
BY THE LORD HARRY!" which had the desired effect.

MCLXX.--A GOOD LIKENESS.

A PERSON who had often teased another ineffectually for subscriptions to
charitable undertakings, was one day telling him that he had just seen
his picture. "And did you ask it for a subscription?" said the
non-giver. "No, I saw no chance," replied the other; "it was _so like
you_."

MCLXXI.--CUTTING AN ACQUAINTANCE.

GEORGE SELWYN, happening to be at Bath when it was nearly empty, was
induced, for the mere purpose of killing time, to cultivate the
acquaintance of an elderly gentleman he was in the habit of meeting at
the Rooms. In the height of the following season, Selwyn encountered his
old associate in St. James's street. He endeavored to pass unnoticed,
but in vain. "What! don't you recollect me?" exclaimed the _cuttee_. "I
recollect you perfectly," replied Selwyn; "and when I next go to Bath, I
shall be most happy to become acquainted _with you again_."

MCLXXII.--VERY SHOCKING, IF TRUE.

AT a dinner-party, one of the guests used his knife improperly in
eating. At length a wag asked aloud: "Have you heard of poor L----'s sad
affair? I met him at a party yesterday, when to our great horror, he
suddenly took up the k