--"No," replied the
baron; "whom did _he rob_?"

MCDXXXVI.--A GOOD REASON FOR A BAD CAUSE.

AN eminent counsellor asked another why he so often undertook bad
causes. "Sir," answered the lawyer, "I have lost so many _good_ ones,
that I am quite at a loss which to take."

MCDXXXVII.--SELF-APPLAUSE.

SOME persons can neither stir hand nor foot without making it clear they
are thinking of themselves, and laying little traps for
approbation.--S.S.

MCDXXXVIII.--A WOODEN JOKE.

BURKE said of Lord Thurlow, "He was a sturdy _oak_ at Westminster, and a
_willow_ at St James's."

MCDXXXIX.--AN OLD ADAGE REFUTED.

A SCHOLAR having fallen into the hands of robbers was fastened to a
tree, and left so nearly a whole day, till one came and unloosed him.
"Now," says he, "the old adage must be false, which saith that the
_tide_ tarrieth for no man."

MCDXL.--THEATRICAL PURGATIONS.

A DRAMATIC author once observed that he knew nothing so terrible as
reading his piece before a critical audience. "I know but one more
terrible," said Compton, the actor, "to be obliged to sit and _hear
it_."

MCDXLI.--ALL THE SAME.

IN Edinburgh resided a gentleman, who is as huge, though not so witty,
as Falstaff. It is his custom when he travels to book two places, and
thus secure half the inside to himself. He once sent his servant to book
him to Glasgow. The man returned with the following pleasing
intelligence: "I've booked you, sir; there weren't two inside places
left, so I booked you _one in_ and _one out_."

MCDXLII.--THE PRINCIPLE OF GOVERNMENTS.

I SHALL not easily forget the sarcasm of Swift's simile as he told us of
the Prince of Orange's harangue to the mob of Portsmouth. "We are come,"
said he, "for your good--_for all your goods_."--"A universal
principle," added Swift, "of all governments; but, like most other
truths, only _told by mistake_."

MCDXLIII.--DR. WALCOT'S APPLICATION FOR SHIELD'S IVORY OPERA PASS.

SHIELD, while the supplicating poor
Ask thee for _meat_ with piteous moans;
More humble I approach thy door,
And beg for nothing but thy _bones_.

MCDXLIV.--COOKING HIS GOOSE.

THE performers rallying Cooke one morning, in the green room, on the
awkward cut of a new coat, he apologized, by saying, "It was his
tailor's _fault_."--"Yes, poor man," said Munden, "and his _misfortune_
too!"

MCDX