is
boundless.--_Seneca_.

AMERICANS

A French magazine claims to have discovered in a New York paper an
advertisement to this effect: "A gentleman who has lost his right leg
is desirous of making the acquaintance of some one who has lost his
left leg, in order to become associated with him in the purchase
of boots and shoes, size 8." The very observant French editor very
politely comments: "An American may occasionally lose a leg, but he
never loses his head."

"That's the Goddess of Liberty," explained the New Yorker. "Fine
attitude, eh?"

"Yes, and typically American," replied the Western visitor. "Hanging
to a strap."

"William," asked the teacher of a rosy-faced lad, "can you tell me who
George Washington was?"

"Yes, ma'am," was the quick reply. "He was an American gen'ral."

"Quite right," replied the teacher. "And can you tell us what George
Washington was remarkable for?"

"Yes, ma'am," replied the little boy. "He was remarkable because he
was an American and told the truth."

A party of tourists were looking at Vesuvius in full eruption. "Ain't
this just like hell!" exclaimed an American. "Ah, the Americans," said
a Frenchman standing by, "Where have they not been?"

AMUSEMENTS

It was a sweet, sad play, and there was hardly a dry handkerchief in
the house. But one man in the first balcony irritated his neighbors
excessively by refusing to take the performance in the proper spirit.
Instead of weeping, he laughed. While others were mopping their eyes
and endeavoring to stifle their sobs, his face beamed with merriment
and he burst into inappropriate guffaws.

At last a lady by his side turned upon him indignantly.

"I d-don't know what brought y-you here," she sobbed, with streaming
eyes, and pressing her hand against her aching heart; "but if y-you
don't like the p-play you might l-let other p-people enjoy it!"

ANCESTRY

HAMPTON--"Dinwiddow told me his family is a very old one. They were
one of the first to come across."

RHODES--"The grocer told me yesterday that now they are the last to
come across."--_Judge_.

"Pa, what are ancestors?"

"Well, my son, I'm one of yours. Your grandpa is another."

"Oh! Then why is it people brag about them?"

HE--"My ancestors came over in the _Mayflower_."

SHE--"It's lucky they did; the immigration laws are a little stricter
now."

ANIMALS

It was Robert's first visit to the Zoo.

"What do you thi