I.

_Enter MICIO, from the house of SOSTRATA._

MIC. (_to SOSTRATA, within._) Every thing's ready with us, as I told
you, Sostrata, when you like. --Who, I wonder, is making my door fly
open with such fury?

_Enter DEMEA in haste, from the house of MICIO._

DEM. Alas! what shall I do? How behave? In what terms exclaim, or how
make my complaint? O heavens! O earth! O seas of Neptune!

MIC. (_apart._) Here's for you! he has discovered all about the
affair; {and} of course is now raving about it; a quarrel is the
consequence; I must assist him,[84] {however}. DEM. See, here comes
the common corrupter of my children.

MIC. Pray moderate your passion, and recover yourself.

DEM. I have moderated it; I am myself; I forbear all reproaches; let
us come to the point: was this agreed upon between us,-- proposed by
yourself, in fact,-- that you were not to concern yourself about my
{son}, nor I about yours? Answer me.

MIC. It is the fact,-- I don't deny it.

DEM. Why is he now carousing at your house? Why are you harboring my
son? Why do you purchase a mistress for him, Micio? Is it at all fair,
that I should have any less justice from you, than you from me? Since
I do not concern myself about your {son}, don't you concern yourself
about mine.

MIC. You don't reason fairly.

DEM. No?

MIC. For surely it is a maxim of old, that among themselves all things
are common to friends.

DEM. Smartly {said}; you've got that speech up for the occasion.

MIC. Listen to a few words, unless it is disagreeable, Demea. In the
first place, if the extravagance your sons are guilty of distresses
you, pray do reason with yourself. You formerly brought up the two
suitably to your circumstances, thinking that your own property would
have to suffice for them both; and, of course, you then thought that I
should marry. Adhere to that same old rule {of yours},-- save, scrape
together, {and} be thrifty {for them}; take care to leave them as much
as possible, and {take} that credit to yourself: my fortune, which has
come to them beyond their expectation, allow them to enjoy; of {your}
captial there will be no diminution; what comes from this quarter, set
it {all} down as so much gain. If you think proper impartially to
consider these matters in your mind, Demea, you will save me and
yourself, and them, {considerable} uneasiness.

DEM. I don't speak about the expense; their morals--

MIC. Hold; I understand you; that point I was comi