as
retired on an independence? Because he took a great profit (prophet)
out of the water.

How did Jonah feel when the whale was going to swallow him? Down in
the mouth--as if he was going to blubber.

What divine law did the whale obey when he swallowed Jonah? Jonah was
a stranger and he took him in.

Who was Jonah's tutor? The whale that brought him up.

Wherein did the prophet Jonah differ from the modern theologians?
Because while he disagreed with the whale, they disagree about him.

Why was John the Baptist like a penny? Because he was one cent
(sent).

Who won the first horse race in the Bible? Herodias' daughter when
she got a head of John the Baptist on a charger.

When is a policeman like the good Samaritan? When he comes out of
some area (Samaria).

Which are the two smallest things mentioned in the Scripture? The
widow's mite, and the wicked flee.

Why is a good wife like the devil? While the husbandman sleepeth, she
seweth (soweth) tears (tares).

CHAPTER IV

HISTORICAL CONUNDRUMS

There has been but one king crowned in England since the conquest.
What king was he? James I. He was King of Scotland before he was King
of England.

When Louis Philippe was deposed, why did he lose less than any of his
subjects? Because, while he lost only a crown, they lost a sovereign.

Why is a portrait of Queen Elizabeth like a wager which is neither
lost nor won? Because it is a drawn Bet.

What Egyptian official would a little boy mention if he were to call
his mother to the window to see something wonderful? "Mammy, look!"
(Mameluke).

What young ladies won the battle of Salamis? The Miss Tocles
(Themistocles).

Who was the most wretched of all the murderers of Julius Caesar? The
miserable Cinna (sinner).

What is the difference between the Emperor of Russia and a beggar?
One issues manifestoes; the other manifests toes without 'is shoes.

Why is the Emperor of Russia like a greedy schoolboy on Christmas
Day? Because he's confounded Hung(a)ry, and longs for Turkey.

Why is chloroform like Mendelssohn? Because it is one of the great
composers of modern times.

Why was William Tell like a post? Because they couldn't get a bough
out of him.

The name of what character in history would a person mention in
asking the servant to put coal on the fire? Philip the Great (fill up
the grate).

Why are volunteers like Lord Nelson? Because the last thing he did
was to die for his country, and