cond, he replied, "Action," and
which was the third, he still answered "Action."--_Plutarch_.

OUTDOOR LIFE

One day, in the spring of '74, Cap Smith's freight outfit pulled into
Helena, Montana. After unloading the freight, the "mule-skinners," to a
man, repaired to the Combination Gambling House and proceeded to load
themselves. Late in the afternoon, Zeb White, Smith's oldest skinner,
having exchanged all of his hard coin for liquid refreshment, zigzagged
into the corral, crawled under a wagon, and went to sleep. After supper,
Smith, making his nightly rounds, happened on the sleeping Zeb.

"Kinder chilly, ain't it?" he asked, after earnestly prodding Zeb with a
convenient stick.

"I reckon 'tis," Zeb drowsily mumbled.

"Ain't yer 'fraid ye'll freeze?"

'"Tis cold, ain't it? Say, Cap, jest throw on another wagon, will yer?"

PAINTING

_See_ Art.

PAINTINGS

She had engaged a maid recently from the country, and was now employed
in showing her newly acquired treasure over the house and enlightening
her in regard to various duties, etc. At last they reached the best
room. "These," said the mistress of the house, pausing before an
extensive row of masculine portraits, "are very valuable, and you must
be very careful when dusting. They are old masters." Mary's jaw dropped,
and a look of intense wonder overspread her rubicund face.

"Lor', mum," she gasped, gazing with bulging eyes on the face of her new
employer, "lor', mum, who'd ever 'ave thought you'd been married all
these times!"

A picture is a poem without words.--_Cornificus_.

PANICS

One night at a theatre some scenery took fire, and a very perceptible
odor of burning alarmed the spectators. A panic seemed to be imminent,
when an actor appeared on the stage.

"Ladies and gentlemen," he said, "compose yourselves. There is no
danger."

The audience did not seem reassured.

"Ladies and gentlemen," continued the comedian, rising to the necessity
of the occasion, "confound it all--do you think if there was any danger
I'd be here?"

The panic collapsed.

PARENTS

William, aged five, had been reprimanded by his father for interrupting
while his father was telling his mother about the new telephone for
their house. He sulked awhile, then went to his mother, and, patting her
on the cheeks, said, "Mother dear, I love you."

"Don't you love me too?" asked his father.

Without glancing at him, William