r the booth and tell "Central" you
want Bryant 4310. After a few minutes "Central" says, "What number did
you call?" You say patiently, "Bryant 4310." She replies, "Bryant 4310
has been changed to Schuyler 6372." You ask for Schuyler 6372. Finally
a woman's voice says, "Yass." You say, "Is Miss Doe in?" She replies,
"Yass." You say, "May I speak to her?" She says, "Who?" You reply, "You
said Miss Doe was at home, didn't you?" She replies, "Yass." You say,
"Well, may I speak to her?" The voice says, "Who?" You shout, "Miss
Doe." The voice says, "She ban out." You shriek, "Oh, go to hell!" and
assuming a graceful, easy position in the booth, you proceed to tear the
telephone from the wall. Later on in the day, when you have two or three
hours of spare time, you can telephone Miss Doe again and arrange for
the evening's visit.

MAKING THE FIRST CALL

The custom of social "calls" between young men and young women is one
of the prettiest of etiquette's older conventions, and one around which
clusters a romantic group of delightful traditions. In this day and
generation, what with horseless carriages, electric telephones and
telegraphs, and dirigible gas bags, a great many of the older forms have
been allowed to die out, greatly, I believe, to our discredit. "Speed,
not manners," seems to be the motto of this century. I hope that there
still exist a few young men who care enough about "good form" to study
carefully to perfect themselves in the art of "calling." Come, Tom, Dick
and Harry--drop your bicycles for an afternoon and fill your minds with
something besides steam engines and pneumatic tires!

The first call at the home of any young lady of fashion is an extremely
important social function, and too great care can not be taken that you
prepare yourself thoroughly in advance. It would be well to leave your
work an hour or two earlier in the afternoon, so that you can go
home and practice such necessary things as entering or leaving a room
correctly. Most young men are extremely careless in this particular, and
unless you rehearse yourself thoroughly in the proper procedure you are
apt to find later on to your dismay that you have made your exit through
a window onto the fire-escape instead of through the proper door.

CONVERSATION AND SOME OF ITS USES

Your conversation should also be planned more or less in advance. Select
some topic in which you think your lady friend will be interested, such
as, for example,