reproof had such an effect upon the person to whom it was
addressed, that she immediately laid aside her trappings of grief, and
went about her necessary business and avocations.

DCLXXXVII.--ONE BITE AT A CHERRY.

A YOUNG fellow once offered to kiss a Quakeress. "Friend," said she,
"thee must not do it."--"O, _by Jove!_ but I must," said the youth.
"Well, friend, as thee hast _sworn_, thee may do it, but thee must not
make a practice of it."

DCLXXXVIII.--A FIG FOR THE GROCER!

WHEN Abernethy was canvassing for the office of surgeon to St.
Bartholomew's Hospital, he called upon a rich grocer. The great man,
addressing him, said, "I suppose, sir, you want my vote and interest at
this momentous epoch of your life."--"No, I don't," said Abernethy. "I
want a pennyworth of figs; come, look sharp and wrap them up; I want to
be off!"

DCLXXXIX.--STEAM-BOAT RACING.

SIR CHARLES LYELL, when in the United States, received the following
advice from a friend: "When you are racing with an opposition
steam-boat, or chasing her, and the other passengers are cheering the
captain, who is sitting on the safety-valve to keep it down with his
weight, go as far as you can from the engine, and lose no time,
especially if you hear the captain exclaim, 'Fire up, boys! put on the
resin!' Should a servant call out, 'Those gentlemen who have not paid
their passage will please to go to the ladies' cabin,' obey the summons
without a moment's delay, for then an explosion may be apprehended. 'Why
to the ladies' cabin?' said I. Because it is the safe end of the boat,
and they are getting anxious for the personal security of those who have
not yet paid their dollars, being, of course, indifferent about the
rest. Therefore never pay in advance; for should you fall overboard
during a race, and the watch cries out to the captain, 'A passenger
overboard,' he will ask, 'Has he paid his passage?' and if he receives
an answer in the affirmative, he will call out '_Go ahead_!'"

DCXC.--GENTLY, JEMMY.

SIR JAMES MACKINTOSH invited Dr. Parr to take a drive in his gig. The
horse became restive. "Gently, Jemmy," says the doctor, "don't irritate
him; always soothe your horse, Jemmy. You'll do better without me. Let
me down, Jemmy." Once on _terra-firma_, the doctor's view of the case
was changed. "Now, Jemmy, touch him up. Never let a horse get the better
of you. Touch him up, conquer him, don't spare him; and now,