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J: The tenth letter of the alphabet, used almost exclusively to
designate a Reub with rubber in the neck--whatever that may be.
###

[Illustration: JAY]

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JAG. See gold cure. If that hasn't any effect, see an undertaker.

JOCKEY. A hero or a slob--it all together depends on where the horse
finishes.

JOKE. Something that's extremely clever--when we make it ourselves.

[Illustration.]

JOLLY. Flattery with a smile on its face.

JOLT. The thing a man gets who thinks he knows it all.

JOY. Gladness with the lid off.

JUG. A place to keep the material before it becomes a jag.

JUDGMENT. An ability which some men get credit for having when in
reality they are merely lucky at guessing things.

JUSTICE. The name we give it when the verdict is the way we want it.

[Illustration: "K--A Small boy can spoil the most favorable
circumstance."]

Kisses go by favorable circumstances.

Kidders are as happy as kids till somebody kids them.

Keep a stiff upper lip--especially when you're shaving yourself.

Knockers never have weak lungs.

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###
K: The eleventh letter of the alphabet, pronounced K, as in Knuckle.
###

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KEEN. A grafter with a victim in sight.

KENO. What the grafter says when he's through with the victim.

KEEP. The motto of the Trusts.

KEY. An instrument used at 2 A.M. in connection with a door to determine
whether a man is sober or not.

[Illustration]

KEROSENE. An ambitious substance used by cooks when they want to go out
through the kitchen roof.

KICKER. A man with a grouch on the inside and a voice on the outside.

KISS. A sigh set to music. The oldest monopoly in the world with the
exception of John D. Rockerfeller. A kiss is the soul's cocktail. A
wireless message from he to she, with a little peaches and cream on the
side.

[Illustration]

KNOCKER. A hurdle in the way of the worthy. A chin-critic. An expert
with the harpoon.

[Illustration: "L--When a man is so lazy that he won't talk he is
called profound."]

Love laughs at everybody except the girl's Papa.

Laziness generally attacks every part of a man except his tongue.

Lots of men spend two dollars' worth of worry over the loss of a
quarter.

Look around and you'll see that the world likes to side with the man who
has the cash.

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