. Grundy or
her predecessors, which kept young men and women from enjoying each
other's society in an innocent, natural way. Of course there is no
gain without a certain amount of loss, and while we have advanced in
freedom we have retrograded in chivalry, deference, and courtesy.

The girl who daily meets a man on common ground in his business or his
sport is not regarded by him with the same "distant reverence" which
the devout lover of former days cherished for the lady of his heart.
Perhaps as we are but human beings it is as well that we are more
natural, and less given to idealise our beloved. Women are no longer
brought up in the belief that it is a disgrace not to get married, and
a still greater disgrace to show the least sign of being anxious to
fulfil their destiny. Every normally-minded woman who is honest with
herself must confess to her own heart--even if to no other--that
marriage rightly understood is the life for which she was intended,
and the one in which she would find the highest, purest happiness. If,
however, the right man fails to appear, she can make herself very
happy. She does not think that each man of her acquaintance is
desirous to marry her, or that a ten minutes' _tete-a-tete_ will
expose her to the risk of a proposal.

As things go now men and women in England have abundant opportunities
for seeing and knowing each other before linking their lives together.
This freedom of intercourse, {15} however, is fettered here and there
by what we call Etiquette, which varies considerably in the different
scales of social life. The coster may have less ceremony in his wooing
and wedding than the nobleman; the royal prince is hedged in by
formalities unknown to the middle classes; but in every rank there are
accepted traditions, written and unwritten rules, to which men and
women must submit if they will be self-respecting, law-abiding
citizens.

{16}

CHAPTER I

_The Beginnings of Courtship--Favourable Opportunities--Intellectual
Affinity--Artistic Fellowship--Athletic Comradeship--Amateur
Acting--Social Intercourse--Different Ideas of Etiquette._

Who can fix the exact time at which Courtship begins? It may or may
not be preceded by Love; it may coincide with the birth of the tender
passion; it may possibly be well in advance of Cupid's darts; or, sad
to say, it may be little more than the prelude to a purely business
transaction.

Opportunities.

Men and women meet each ot