are in the running, and she must not let her feeling
for him lead her into {40} discourtesy to any one else. She can let him
do the wooing without being either haughty or capricious, for no man
likes a woman who openly runs after him.

Transparent Devices.

A nice-minded girl does not always try to detach her lover from the
rest of the company, though she enjoys a _tete-a-tete_ as much as he
does. She does not want to be sent with him on fictitious errands to
the bottom of the garden. She leaves him to find the opportunities,
and has a horror of her matchmaking relations.

How She may Ward off an Unwelcome Offer.

It is commonly agreed that a woman ought to be able to do this in the
vast majority of cases. Her own intuition is seldom at fault. Even at
the eleventh hour she may save the situation by a timely jest, a
kindly bit of inconsequence, a sudden humorous inspiration--not at his
expense, of course--and the man who is not a fool will see that it is not
the psychological moment. Above all she must avoid being alone with him.
Let her keep a child at her side, pay attention to the greatest bore,
listen with grateful patience to the most prosy person she knows, rather
than leave the ground clear for him. She should not go for moonlight
strolls, nor to look for the Southern Cross on board ship, if she really
wants to stave off his proposal. There is no need to be rude, and even
if she has to appear unsympathetic, that is better than to humiliate him
by a rejection. Some women glory over their hapless suitors as an Indian
counts his scalps. This is the height of bad taste and heartlessness.
We may be forgiven for hoping that they get left in the end themselves.

{41}

CHAPTER VI

_The Question of Age--Young Lovers--Young Men who Woo Maturity--Old Men
who Court Youth--Middle-aged Lovers._

The Question of Age.

At what age should the responsibilities of the married state be
undertaken? In the best years of life if possible. Not in the physical
and mental immaturity of early youth. How can the child-wife of
seventeen fulfil all the duties of her position, and endow her child
with the needful strength for the journey of life? How can the boy of
twenty be expected to work for three without getting weary before his
day has well begun? And how can either of them really know wherein
true happiness lies? Most probably such a pair will learn to curse
their folly before they reach maturity.

But marriage