mental attitude that will
rob courtship of more than half its charm.

{36}

CHAPTER V

_Flirts, Male and Female--He Changes his Mind on the Verge of a
Proposal--How She accepts the Situation--How She may give
Encouragement or ward off an Unwelcome Offer._

It may be questioned whether there is any etiquette in flirtation.
Yes, I think there is. Flirts of both sexes may be divided into two
large classes--(1) the wanton and deliberate; (2) the kindly and
spontaneous.

Flirts.

The first class are birds of prey. The man is probably very charming,
a delightful companion, an ideal cavalier, a man whose society a woman
always enjoys--especially if she does not take him seriously. It is
she who fails to realise that she is only one of a large number who
fall victims and suffer accordingly. She blissfully accepts his subtle
suggestion that she is _the_ one woman in the world for him--so she is
while they are together--and flatters herself that though he may have
flirted with others he is really in love with her. When once the sport
of the moment is over he leaves his prey, more or less cruelly
wounded, and gaily seeks new fields for his prowess. This sort of man
likes young and inexperienced girls or women whose confiding trust
exceeds their power of discernment.

It is an unpardonable breach of etiquette for a man to abuse
hospitality and the privilege of intercourse by wanton conduct of this
kind.

Making a Girl Conspicuous.

A man should remember that it is the woman who suffers from the breath
of slander or the pettiness of gossip. Such {37} things affect him but
little, if at all. Suppose that two young people belong to a public
tennis or dramatic club. The man singles out one particular girl by
his attentions, makes a point of always seeing her home, establishes
himself as her constant cavalier, and thus puts it in the power of the
gossips to say "Well, if they are not engaged they ought to be!" After
a time he cools off, for no other reason than that he is tired of the
girl or has possibly seen a fresh and more attractive face. It may
have dawned upon him that he might be asked his intentions, and he
does not care to confess that he never had any. This course of action
is especially unfair in the case of a young girl whose experience of
men's ways is but beginning. An older woman ought to be able to take
care of herself, and if she thinks such a game worth the candle, no
one can blame the man fo