* * * *

THE BARRISTERS OF ENGLAND!

The Barristers of England, how hungrily they stand
About the Hall of Westminster, with wig, and gown, and band;
With brief bag full of dummies and fee book full of _oughts_,
Result of the establishment of the New County Courts.

The Barristers of England, how listlessly they sit,
Expending on each other a small amount of wit;
Without the opportunity of doing something worse,
By talking nonsense at the cost of some poor client's purse.

The Barristers of England, how when they get a cause,
They (some of them) will disregard all gentlemanly laws;
And bullying the witnesses upon the adverse side,
Will do their very utmost the honest truth to hide.

The Barristers of England, how with _sang froid_ sublime,
They undertake to advocate two causes at one time;
And when they find it is a thing impossible to do,
They throw one client overboard, but take the fees of two.

The Barristers of England, how rarely they refuse,
The party they appear against with coarseness to abuse;
Feeling a noble consciousness no punishment can reach
The vulgar ribaldry they call the "privilege of speech."

The Barristers of England, how often they degrade
An honourable calling to a pettifogging trade,
And show how very slight the lines of separation are,
Between the cabman's license, and the "licence of the Bar."

The Barristers of England, how, if they owe a grudge,
They try with insolence to goad a poor Assistant-Judge;
And after having bullied him, their bold imposture clench
By talking of their high respect for the Judicial Bench.

The Barristers of England, how sad it is to feel
That rant will pass for energy, and bluster goes for zeal;
But 'tis a consolation that 'mid their ranks there are
Sufficient gentlemen to save the credit of the Bar.

* * * * *

DONE BROWN AGAIN.

"MR. PUNCH,--When will Sivilians learn to hold their _assinine_ tongs
about millitary affairs, I should like to know? Just read this. It is in
your preshous _Times_ this morning.

'The Indian Sepoys are very fair troops.'

"Now, Sir, I ask you, is such blazing ignoranse to be tollerated? I have
served in India, Sir, and the Seapoys are all the _brownest beggars_ you
ever saw. Mahoggany's a fool to them. And yet the _Times_ pretends to
tell officers and gentlemen their duty. By showing wich up will oblige