of L2605 0_s._ 8_d._ as an airy nothing, we can
hardly reconcile ourselves to the facts we have called attention to.

* * * * *

NEWS FROM THE THEATRE OF WAR.

Our latest news from the Theatre of War is from Astley's Theatre, where
the War with Russia is being carried out with unflagging energy. Last
night the Russians had entrenched themselves in a strong position in
front of the enemy, and the Russian General, WIDDICOMB, turned the right
wing--a wrong one having been turned by the negligence of a
scene-shifter. The enemy were in position at nine o'clock, and a French
officer made towards a standard, which he eventually carried. On
Saturday afternoon a body of Russian soldiers received their pay from
the treasury, which is understood to be amply supplied.

In the evening the battle was resumed with great vigour; but both
parties eventually laid down their arms. The Russians were much
harassed, and set fire to Moscow in several places with bits of tow
steeped in spirits of wine. The city burnt with great fury for nearly an
entire minute, when it was terminated by a decisive blow from the mouth
of the master carpenter.

* * * * *

A POLITICAL PROBLEM SOLVED.

Why are diplomatic papers called Circular notes?--They are called
_Circular_, because they frequently arrive at no definite end.

[Illustration: A NEW CHIME FOR BOW BELLS.

_DON'T_ TURN AGAIN, WHITTINGTON; _DON'T_ BE LORD MAYOR OF LONDON.]

* * * * *

READING THE (DRAMATIC) STARS.

[Illustration: T]

The other day we read an account of a few complimentary words having
been spoken by the EMPEROR OF RUSSIA to a French Opera dancer, from
which some _Gobemouche_ had drawn the inference that there would be no
war between Russia and France. Upon a similar authority we might
announce that there is no possibility of any collision between France
and England. At one of the performances of "TOM" MATTHEWS, as English
_Clown_, during his engagement in Paris, the Emperor LOUIS NAPOLEON was
seen to applaud. It might also be inferred that the British Government
stood pledged to support the Constitutional cause in Italy, because
COSTA is a Sardinian, and is usually employed to preside at the piano
when a concert is given at the Palace.

* * * * *

OUR TOURIST IN PARIS.--No. 11.

"Oh, I say!" says old MARTINGALE, bursting in upon the Tourist'