f the
Corporation, as we can assure him that the alleged cause of his anxiety
does not exist.

* * * * *

THE DANGERS OF INFANCY.

The two serpents that HERCULES strangled in his cradle were a couple of
bottles of DAFFY'S ELIXIR and GODFREY'S CORDIAL. If he hadn't killed
them, they would have killed him.

* * * * *

THE OLDEST LAWYER.

We see announced the "Death of the Oldest Lawyer." How old he was, we
cannot say--but we always thought "The Oldest Lawyer" what is properly
called "THE NICK OF TIME."

* * * * *

[Illustration: WHERE IGNORANCE IS BLISS, ETC.]

* * * * *

A DONKEY AND A MAYOR.

PLUTARCH delighted in parallels: _Punch_ takes pleasure in the like
intellectual exercise. Our friend of the _Notes and Queries_ speaks of a
"vast _quantity_ of donkeys" at Malvern (for at that favoured place
donkeys are measured by the peck and bushel). And amongst these donkeys
was, until lately, a very superior ass named, for certain achievements
performed in the cause of the late QUEEN ADELAIDE, the "_Royal_ Moses."
It seems that the good QUEEN was wont to be carried on the back of
Moses--at the time simply Moses, and no more--to the summit of the thymy
hills of Malvern; Moses, no doubt, inwardly rejoiced and comforted by a
knowledge, or at least suspicion, of the preciousness of the burden (for
he carried L100,000 per annum) that honoured him; for even asses have
shrewd instincts in the presence of the Royal and the great. Well, HER
MAJESTY being about to leave Malvern, rewards the old woman whose
property Moses is: at the same time, with her wonted benevolence,
inquiring if she could do any further service, likely, in this world of
nice distinctions, to give--in return for the many rides on Moses--the
old woman a lift. After a while, pondering the matter, the old woman
said--"Please your BLESSED MAJESTY, give a name to my donkey." Now, as
the animal was an ass upon four legs, there was no precedent for
bestowing upon him a baronetcy or even a knighthood: he could not be
called SIR MOSES ASINUS, BART.--neither dubbed simply SIR MOSES.
Otherwise, in the latter case, we doubt not the good-natured QUEEN,
calling for a bulrush from the ponds of Malvern, the donkey sagaciously
going upon his knees, would have been melodiously commanded to "Rise,
SIR MOSES." The four legs, however, stood in the w