. Had been accused of shifting his bed. So would the
Corporation, if their bed had been filled with mud and shingle. Thought
they should have kept his bed cleaner. Would like to alter the old
proverb, for their benefit, and wished that 'as they had made his bed,
so they might lie in it.'"

FATHER THAMES having concluded his evidence, his sister MEDWAY was about
to offer her statement of grievances, when an usher announced that the
WATER BAILIFF was coming up stairs. Upon which the two rivers, with,
fear and perturbation in their countenances, scuttled out of a side door
in dread of meeting that terrible functionary.

* * * * *

A BAD SPEC.

News has arrived that "the Russians had invested Giurgevo, but were not
strong enough to attack." We can only say that the "investment" must
have been rather an unprofitable affair.

* * * * *

THE EXCHANGE CHIMES.

[Illustration: M]

MR. PUNCH is happy to announce that the difficulties which have so long
prevented the Royal Exchange Chimes from being completed have been
removed, and that the following airs, appropriate to the present
condition of City politics, will immediately be heard from the GRESHAM
tower. The contractor gives hopes that the new year will be played in by
them.

THE DAYS OF OTHER MAYORS.

AIR.--"_The Light of other Days._"

The days of other Mayors have faded,
And Aldermen are past;
The Cit who hopes to do as _they_ did,
Is hoping much too fast.
For London dooms the clique to ruin.
She'll mind her own affairs;
And the Mansion House see no renewing
The days of other Mayors.

* * *

THOSE GRESHAM CHIMES.

AIR.--"_Evening Bells._"

Those GRESHAM Chimes, those GRESHAM Chimes!
They take us back to TUDOR times,
When Merchant Princes felt no shame
To bear a civic magnate's name.

That name has sunk below disdain,
No GRESHAM dons the civic chain,
A Merchant Prince as soon would wear
The garb of Beadle as of Mayor.

But Mayors and such will soon be gone,
A new _regime_ is coming on;
We'll hope to hear, in better times,
Some GRESHAM hailed by GRESHAM Chimes.

* * *

THE CURFEW.

AIR.--"_The Curfew tolls the knell of parting day._"

The Curfew tolls the knell of those whose day
Is done--those greedy "creatures on our lee"--
Woe to the burly phalanx so _au fait_
At hiding callipash and c