Mirificost fato nactus utrumque malum,
Nam quotiens futuit, totiens ulciscitur ambos: 5
Illam adfligit odore, ipse perit podagra.
LXXI.
TO VERRO.
An of a goat-stink damned from armpits fusty one suffer,
Or if a crippling gout worthily any one rack,
'Tis that rival o' thine who lief in loves of you meddles,
And, by a wondrous fate, gains him the twain of such ills.
For that, oft as he ----, so oft that penance be two-fold; 5
Stifles her stench of goat, he too is kilt by his gout.
If ever anyone was deservedly cursed with an atrocious goat-stench from
armpits, or if limping gout did justly gnaw one, 'tis thy rival, who
occupies himself with your love, and who has stumbled by the marvel of fate
on both these ills. For as oft as he swives, so oft is he taken vengeance
on by both; she he prostrates by his stink, he is slain by his gout.
LXXII.
Dicebas quondam solum te nosse Catullum,
Lesbia, nec prae me velle tenere Iovem.
Dilexi tum te non tantum ut volgus amicam,
Sed pater ut gnatos diligit et generos.
Nunc te cognovi: quare etsi inpensius uror, 5
Multo mi tamen es vilior et levior.
Qui potisest? inquis. quod amantem iniuria talis
Cogit amare magis, sed bene velle minus.
LXXII.
TO LESBIA THE FALSE.
Wont thou to vaunt whilome of knowing only Catullus
(Lesbia!) nor to prefer Jupiter's self to myself.
Then, too, I loved thee well, not as vulgar wretch his mistress
But as a father his sons loves and his sons by the law.
Now have I learnt thee aright; wherefor though burn I the hotter, 5
Lighter and viler by far thou unto me hast become.
"How can this be?" dost ask: 'tis that such injury ever
Forces the hotter to love, also the less well to will.
Once thou didst profess to know but Catullus, Lesbia, nor wouldst hold Jove
before me. I loved thee then, not only as a churl his mistress, but as a
father loves his own sons and sons-in-law. Now I do know thee: wherefore if
more strongly I burn, thou art nevertheless to me far viler and of lighter
thought. How may this be? thou askest. Because such wrongs drive a lover to
greater passion, but to less wishes of welfare.
LXXIII.
Desine de quoquam quicquam bene velle mereri
Aut aliquem fieri posse putare pium.
Omnia sunt ingrata, nihil fecisse benigne
_Prodest_, immo etiam taedet obestque magis
Vt mihi, quem nemo gravius nec ace
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