er. The colored man was in a highly disheveled
state and his face was bruised badly. His eyes popped at sight of the
furious traveling man, who allowed no opportunity for explanations or
excuses. He did all the talking, and did it forcibly. When at last the
outraged salesman went away, the porter shook his head dismally, and
muttered:

"Now, Ah shohly wonder who-all Ah done put off at Cleveland."

* * *

The assistant minister announced to the congregation that a special
baptismal service would be held the following Sunday at three o'clock in
the afternoon, and that any infants to receive the rite should be
brought to the church at that time.

The old clergyman, who was deaf, thought that his assistant was speaking
of the new hymnals, and he added a bit of information:

"Anyone not already provided can obtain them in the vestry for a dollar,
or with red backs and speckled edges for one dollar and a half."

* * *

The child went with her mother on a visit in New Jersey. At bedtime, the
little girl was nervous over the strangeness of her surroundings, but
the mother comforted her, saying:

"Remember, dear, God's angels are all about you."

A little later, a cry from the child called the mother back into the
room.

"The angels are buzzing all around just dreadful, mama, and they bite!"

* * *

The new clergyman was coming to call, and the mother gave Emma some
instructions:

"If he asks your name, say Emma Jane; if he asks how old you are, say
you are eight years old; if he asks who made you, say God made me."

It is a fact that the clergyman did ask just those three questions in
that order, to the first two of which Emma replied correctly. But it is
also a fact that when the minister propounded the third query, as to her
origin, the child hesitated, and then said:

"Mama did tell me the man's name, but I've gone and forgotten it."

* * *

The editor of a country newspaper betook himself to a party at the house
of a neighbor, where, only a few weeks earlier, a baby had been added to
the family. On the editor's arrival at the house, he was met at the door
by his hostess, a woman who suffered to some extent from deafness. After
the usual exchange of greetings, the editor inquired concerning the
health of the baby. The hostess had a severe cold, and