h his clenched
teeth.

"My dear friend, above all things I want to behave like a gentleman and to
be recognized as such," the visitor began in an excess of deprecating and
simple-hearted pride, typical of a poor relation. "I am poor, but ... I
won't say very honest, but ... it's an axiom generally accepted in society
that I am a fallen angel. I certainly can't conceive how I can ever have
been an angel. If I ever was, it must have been so long ago that there's
no harm in forgetting it. Now I only prize the reputation of being a
gentlemanly person and live as I can, trying to make myself agreeable. I
love men genuinely, I've been greatly calumniated! Here when I stay with
you from time to time, my life gains a kind of reality and that's what I
like most of all. You see, like you, I suffer from the fantastic and so I
love the realism of earth. Here, with you, everything is circumscribed,
here all is formulated and geometrical, while we have nothing but
indeterminate equations! I wander about here dreaming. I like dreaming.
Besides, on earth I become superstitious. Please don't laugh, that's just
what I like, to become superstitious. I adopt all your habits here: I've
grown fond of going to the public baths, would you believe it? and I go
and steam myself with merchants and priests. What I dream of is becoming
incarnate once for all and irrevocably in the form of some merchant's wife
weighing eighteen stone, and of believing all she believes. My ideal is to
go to church and offer a candle in simple-hearted faith, upon my word it
is. Then there would be an end to my sufferings. I like being doctored
too; in the spring there was an outbreak of smallpox and I went and was
vaccinated in a foundling hospital--if only you knew how I enjoyed myself
that day. I subscribed ten roubles in the cause of the Slavs!... But you
are not listening. Do you know, you are not at all well this evening? I
know you went yesterday to that doctor ... well, what about your health?
What did the doctor say?"

"Fool!" Ivan snapped out.

"But you are clever, anyway. You are scolding again? I didn't ask out of
sympathy. You needn't answer. Now rheumatism has come in again--"

"Fool!" repeated Ivan.

"You keep saying the same thing; but I had such an attack of rheumatism
last year that I remember it to this day."

"The devil have rheumatism!"

"Why not, if I sometimes put on fleshly form? I put on fleshly form and I
take the consequences. Satan _