't
freeze, but when one's in fleshly form, well ... in brief, I didn't think,
and set off, and you know in those ethereal spaces, in the water that is
above the firmament, there's such a frost ... at least one can't call it
frost, you can fancy, 150 degrees below zero! You know the game the
village girls play--they invite the unwary to lick an ax in thirty degrees
of frost, the tongue instantly freezes to it and the dupe tears the skin
off, so it bleeds. But that's only in 30 degrees, in 150 degrees I imagine
it would be enough to put your finger on the ax and it would be the end of
it ... if only there could be an ax there."

"And can there be an ax there?" Ivan interrupted, carelessly and
disdainfully. He was exerting himself to the utmost not to believe in the
delusion and not to sink into complete insanity.

"An ax?" the guest interrupted in surprise.

"Yes, what would become of an ax there?" Ivan cried suddenly, with a sort
of savage and insistent obstinacy.

"What would become of an ax in space? _Quelle idee!_ If it were to fall to
any distance, it would begin, I think, flying round the earth without
knowing why, like a satellite. The astronomers would calculate the rising
and the setting of the ax, _Gatzuk_ would put it in his calendar, that's
all."

"You are stupid, awfully stupid," said Ivan peevishly. "Fib more cleverly
or I won't listen. You want to get the better of me by realism, to
convince me that you exist, but I don't want to believe you exist! I won't
believe it!"

"But I am not fibbing, it's all the truth; the truth is unhappily hardly
ever amusing. I see you persist in expecting something big of me, and
perhaps something fine. That's a great pity, for I only give what I can--"

"Don't talk philosophy, you ass!"

"Philosophy, indeed, when all my right side is numb and I am moaning and
groaning. I've tried all the medical faculty: they can diagnose
beautifully, they have the whole of your disease at their finger-tips, but
they've no idea how to cure you. There was an enthusiastic little student
here, 'You may die,' said he, 'but you'll know perfectly what disease you
are dying of!' And then what a way they have sending people to
specialists! 'We only diagnose,' they say, 'but go to such-and-such a
specialist, he'll cure you.' The old doctor who used to cure all sorts of
disease has completely disappeared, I assure you, now there are only
specialists and they all advertise in the newspapers. If