cuffs with the receiver. As
to the alleged dishonor, I cancel the same, at the request of the
complainant; but it is, of itself, null; for the white hand of a fair
lady cannot possibly dishonor the face of an exciseman.

FREDERICK."

_Berlin, Nov. 30th, 1778._

FELLOW FEELING.

A LADY'S favorite dog having bitten a piece out of a male visitor's leg,
she exclaimed, "Poor dear little creature! _I hope it will not make him
sick._"

UNREASONABLE FASTING.

TWO gentlemen, wishing to go into a tavern on one of the national
fast-days, found the door shut; and on their knocking, the waiter told
them from within, that his master would allow no one to enter during
service on the fast-day. "Your master," said one of them, "might be
contented _to fast himself_, without making his _doors fast too_."

A WHIMSICAL IDEA.

A NOBLE lord asked a clergyman at the foot of his table, why, if there
was a goose at dinner, it was always placed next the parson. "Really,"
said he, "I can give no reason for it; but your question is so odd, that
I shall never after see a _goose_ without thinking of your lordship."

THE BREECHES-MAKER CAPTAIN.

A CAPTAIN in a volunteer corps, drilling his company, had occasion to
desire one of the gentlemen to step farther out in marching. The order
not being attended to, was repeated in a peremptory tone, when the
private exclaimed, "I cannot, captain, _you have made my breeches too
tight_."

TIT FOR TAT.

TWO contractors, who had made large fortunes, had a quarrel. One of
them, in the midst of the altercation, asked the other contemptuously,
"Do you remember, Sir, when you were my footman?" The other answered, "I
do; and had you been my footman, you would have been a footman still."

SOUND ARGUMENT.

A SAILOR being about to set out for India, a citizen asked him:

"Where did your father die?"

"In shipwreck."

"And where did your grandfather die?"

"As he was fishing, a storm arose, and the bark foundering, all on board
perished."

"And your great-grandfather?"

"He also perished on board a ship which struck on a rock."

"Then," said the citizen, "if I were you, _I would never go to sea_."

"And pray, Mr. Philosopher," observed the seaman, "where did your father
die?"

"In his bed."

"And your grandfather?"

"In his bed."

"And your great-grandfather?"

"He and all my ancestors died quietly in their beds."

"Then, if I were you