tinel refused to admit him.

"But, friend," said Armond, "you must let me pass; I am his majesty's
barber."

"Ah, that may be," said the sentinel, "but the king does not shave in
church."

MRS. PARTINGTON'S VERY LAST.

"WHERE did you get so much money, Isaac?" said Mrs. Partington, as he
shook a half handful of copper cents before her, grinning all the while
like a rogue that he is; "have you found the hornicopia or has anybody
given you a request?" She was a little anxious. "I got it from bets,"
said he, chucking them into the air, and allowing half of them to
clatter and rattle about the floor with all the importance of dollars.
"Got them from Bets, did you?" replied she; "and who is Bets that she
should give you money?--she must be some low creature, or you would not
speak of her so disrespectably. I hope you will not get led away by any
desolate companions, Isaac, and become an unworthy membrane of society."
How tenderly the iron-bowed spectacles beamed upon him! "I mean bets,"
said he, laughing, "that I won on Burlingame." "Dear me!" she exclaimed,
"how could you do so when gaming is such a horrid habit? Why, sometimes
people are arranged at the bar for it." She was really uneasy until he
explained that, in imitation of older ones, he had bet some cents on
Burlingame and had won.

ADORATION.

AT a late court, a man and his wife brought cross actions, each charging
the other with having committed assault and battery. On investigation,
it appeared that the husband had pushed the door against the wife, and
the wife in turn pushed the door against the husband. A gentleman of the
bar remarked that he could see no impropriety in a man and his wife
a-_door_-ing each other.

NAUGHTY CHARLES LAMB.

CHARLES LAMB once, while riding in company with a lady, descried a party
denuded for swimming a little way off. He remarked: "Those girls ought
to go to a more retired place." "They are boys," replied the lady. "You
may be right," rejoined Charlie, "I can't distinguish so accurately as
you, at such a distance."

TOO GREEN.

"SALLIE," said a young man to his red-haired sweetheart, "keep your head
away from me; you will set me on fire."

"No danger," was the contemptuous answer, "you are too green to burn."

HIGH COMPANY.

A GASCON was vaunting one day, that in his travels he had been caressed
wherever he went, and had seen all the great men throughout Europe.
"Have you seen