must reconcile myself to it, however, for we
cannot arrange the seasons to suit ourselves. I will learn which is the
stronger, my temperament or my will. I shall impose no thoughts upon my
mind but those which ought to engage it.
I have determined upon this.
*
The shoemaker means to recognize Cinderella by her foot--he finds mine
unusually small for that of a peasant girl.
I trust that the fairy tale may remain a fairy tale.
That touching air from Isouard's Cinderella:
Good child, thou must contented be,
A better lot's in store for thee,
has been haunting me, all day long.
How simple the words! Music is the fairy that invests Cinderella's
accents with royal robes, and enthrones them on the lips of all
mankind.
*
O happy nursery tale! Thou askest not how the princess lived as
poultry-maid. Thy fancy uttered its creative: "Let there be--" and
behold! it was.
But, in life, such transformations are not brought about without great
effort.
Walpurga has rightly divined my feelings. It was but to-day that she
said:
"You can't get used to things here. Life here must seem almost as
strange to you as it did to me in the palace, but, of course, it's
easier to get used to a silken bed than to a sack of leaves."
I felt like saying: "And if one means to go home again, it's far easier
to put up with such discomfort," but I repressed it. One ought not to
torment such people with logical consequences. Their thoughts and
feelings are like the singing of birds, without rhythm and, at best,
like the folk-songs, whose melodies close on the third, instead of on
the key-note.
*
Since the alluring, glittering life of the great world could at any
time have been mine, I find it easy to forego it.
Had I entered a convent and were living there, fettered by a vow and
subject to restraint, I know that I should have mourned away my days
behind the bars.
*
To be without gloves! I never knew that one's hands could become so
cold. I cannot realize that I am without gloves. When he drew off my
glove, a shudder passed through me.--Was it a presentiment?
*
In the mornings I feel the want of a thousand little conveniences, with
which use had so familiarized me that I scarcely knew I possessed them.
I
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