ude often makes one dull and torpid. I sometimes experience this
even in myself.
On a rainy Sunday, Hansei will often stand looking out of the window,
for hours at a time. I feel satisfied that his first thoughts are of a
horse, a cow, the sale of his wood, or of some acquaintance. At last,
he falls into a sort of waking dream, and thinks of nothing at all. One
awakes from this childlike lying down and gazing into the world, as
from strengthening and refreshing sleep. It is indeed only another form
of elementary existence.
*
Judging by my notes, I, at one time, thought this merely a station in
my journey, where one is detained by interests or adventure; but now I
see that I am at the goal.
I will lay down my load, as the grandmother advised me to do, and break
the chests to pieces. I shall remain here for the rest of my life. And
now that I have firmly resolved to remain--even if I were discovered
to-morrow, and the whole world heaped its scorn upon me--I have a happy
feeling of being at home. I am here, and here I shall remain.
I was not reminded of all this until to-day, when my little pitchman
said: "You look so pleased, so--I don't know how, but--you never looked
so before."
Yes, my dear little pitchman, you are right; it was not until to-day
that I felt myself truly at home. I have struck root, like the cherry
sapling before my window.
*
The old pensioner said to me to-day: "Behold, my child, age takes much
from us; but I can still dream as beautifully as I did in my youth."
*
Of all the flowers, I find the heaviest dew on the rose. Is that
because of the rich perfume? Does the perfume form dew? No green leaf
ever has so much dew upon it, as the leaf of a flower.
*
I often feel tempted to tell the story of Leah to the whole household,
Jochem included.
It often annoys me, when I think that I do not impart all I have to my
friends; but how much more it would annoy me, if I were misunderstood
by them.
Even in our day, art and religion are far asunder.
The latter can be imparted to all; the former cannot.
*
It is impossible to interest the masses in refined pleasures. During
the week, they have nothing but hard work; and on Sunday, they find
recreation at ninepins, or in dancing in heavy boots. They require r
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