and the past one not at all.

There is much work awaiting me. I am glad that it is so. Walpurga and
the children are quite happy to have me with them again.

During my absence, Walpurga had my room painted a pale red. It is in
wretched taste, and yet I must needs show myself grateful. She thought
that I would not return.

These people constitute my whole world, and yet I could leave them any
minute. Will it be thus when I, too, leave the world?

*

Courageously to forego the world--I think I have read the expression
somewhere; but now I understand it. I feel it within myself and am
carrying it out; not timidly, not sadly,--but courageously.

*

I am no longer sad. The calm satisfaction with which I resign the world
emancipates me.

When I look at life, I ask myself: "Why all these struggles and all
these barriers, until we come to the last barrier of all, unto death
itself?" The great heroes of history and my little pitchman--not one of
them had the odds of fortune in his favor. No destiny is completely and
purely fulfilled.

Old Jochem said his prayers every day, and would often pass whole hours
thus employed; yet he would curse mankind and his own fate. And I have
known ladies of quality, who, after listening in rapt ecstasy to the
music of Beethoven, would dispute and wrangle after the most vulgar
fashion.

"Courageously to forego." The words are ever haunting me. Thanks for
this precept, kind spirit, whoever thou mayst be! To live out the day
and not allow it to be darkened by the knowledge that night must come,
to forego with courage--that is the sum of all.

I never would have believed that I could live without joy, without
pleasures; but now I see that I can. Joy and pleasure are not the
conditions upon which my life is based.

We have it in our power to attune the mind to cheerfulness; that is, to
calmness and clearness.

*

How many years was it that Hermione, of the "Winter's Tale," remained
hidden? I have quite forgotten.

*

I am constantly reminded, while at work, of various passages, of the
solos, the great choruses, and even the instrumental accompaniments, in
Mozart's "Magic Flute." They fill the silent air with their sounds, and
bear me aloft.

Above all, the appeal, "Be steadfast!" with the three short notes, d,
e, d, and the trumpet-blast th