ch was
defective in courteous attention to my inquisitiveness, which he totally
ignored. For I could not prevail upon him to explain what thing it was
that he directed the oarmen to "wait for," to "spring at from a
stretcher," and "catch at the beginning;" nor why they were forbidden to
row with their hands, not being quadrumanous, and able to employ their
feet in such a manner; nor whether when he commanded them to "get in at
once," he intended them to leap into the waters or to return to the
landing-place, nor why they did neither of these things; nor why he
should express satisfaction that a certain rower had got rid of a lofty
feather, which would indubitably have added to the showiness of his
appearance.

Again, hearing him anxiously inquire the time after a stoppage, I was
proceeding to explain how gladly I would have given him such
information, but for the unavoidable absence of my golden chronometer,
owing to the failure of Misters TOMKINS and JOHNSON to restore the same,
whereupon he treated me in such a "please-go-away-and-die" sort of style
that I subsided with utmost alacrity.

On the return voyage the Collegiate eight was challenged to a spurting
match by a scratched crew, which appeared to me to be the superior in
velocity, though it seemed it was then too late to make the happy
exchange.

When the practice was at an end and the Blues in a state of quiescence,
I intimated my desire to harangue them and express my wonderment and
admiration at beholding them content to suffer such hardships and perils
and faultfinding without expostulation or excuses for their
shortcomings, and all for no pecuniary recompense, but the evasive
reward of a _nominis umbra_. And I would have reminded them of the
extended popularity of their performance, and that it was an unfairness
to muzzle the ox that treadeth upon one's corn, appealing to them to
stand up for their rights, and refuse to compete except for the
honorarium of a _quid pro quo_.

But the official instructor, seeing me about to climb upon the poop, to
deliver my oration, entreated me with so much earnestness to desist that
I became immediately aphonous.

X

_Mr Jabberjee is taken to see a Glove-Fight._

A young sprightly Londoner acquaintance of mine, who is a member of a
Sportish Club where exhibitions of fisticuffs are periodically given,
did generously invite me on a recent Monday evening to be the
eye-witness of this gladiatorial spectacle.