On receipt of this touching and beautiful communication I was again in
the stampede of panic, and realised that I must have immediate resort to
some stronger description of "Spoof."

It is calamitous that I cannot find a card up my sleeve with the single
exception of my young friend HOWARD'S dodge, which I fear will prove too
filamentous.

However, a faint heart never got rid of a fair lady!

XIX

_Mr Jabberjee tries a fresh tack. His visit to the India Office and
sympathetic reception._

In my last I had the honour to report the total non-success of my
endeavour to nill my betrothal on plea of astrological objections, and
how I was consequentially up the tree of embarrassment.

I have since resolved that honesty is my best politics, and have
confessed to Miss MANKLETOW in a well-expressed curt letter that I am
only the possessor of a courtesy title, and, so far from rolling on the
rosy bed of unlimited rhino, am out of elbows, and dependent upon
parental remittances for pin-money.

For corroboration of said statements I begged to refer her politely to
my benevolent friend and patron, Hon'ble Sir CUMMERBUND, Nevern Square,
South Kensington; to whom I simultaneously wrote a private and
confidential note, instructing him that if any young female person was
to inquire particulars of my birth, origin, &c., he was to tell the
truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, especially making it
clear that I was neither a tip-top Rajah, nor a Leviathan of filthy
lucre.

The rest (up to present date) is silence; but I have confident hopes
that the manly, straightforward stratagem suggested by my friend, young
HOWARD, will accomplish the job, and procure me the happy release.

I am now to pass to a different subject--to wit, a visit I paid some
time since to the India Office. The why of the wherefore was that, in
conversation with the ALLBUTT-INNETTS, I had boasted freely of the
credit I was in with certain high grade India Official nobs, who could
refuse me nothing.

Which was hitherto the positive fact, since I had never requested any
favour at their hands.

But Mrs ALLBUTT-INNETT stated that she had heard that the
reception-soirees at said India Office were extremely enjoyable and
classy, and inquired whether I possessed sufficient influence to obtain
for her tickets of admission to one of these select entertainments.

Naturally I had to reply that I could indubitably do the trick, and
would a