ken a religious turn and thought it was wicked to do it
until they married. I had intercourse with her on every possible
occasion: in private rooms at hotels, in railway carriages, in a
field, against a wall, and--when the holidays came--she stayed a
night with me in London. She had apparently no fear of getting in
the family way, and never used any precaution. Sensual as she
was, she did not show her feelings by outward demonstration.

"On one occasion she proposed _fellatio_. She said she had done
it to her _fiance_ and liked it. This is the only case I have
known of a woman wishing to do it for the love of it.

"The emotional tension on my nerves--the continual jealousy I was
in, the knowledge that before long she would marry and we must
part--eventually caused me to get ill. She never told me she
loved me more than any other man; yet, owing to my importunity,
she saw much more of me than anyone else. It came to the ears of
her _fiance_ that she was in my company a great deal; there was a
meeting of the three of us--convened at his wish--at which she
had formally, before him, to say 'good-bye' to me. Yet we still
continued to meet and to have intercourse.

"Then the date of her marriage drew near. She wrote me saying that
she could not see me any more. I forced myself, however, on her,
and our relations still continued. Her elder sister interviewed
me and said she would inform the authorities unless I gave her
up; a brother, too, came to see me and made a row.

"I had what I seriously intended to be a last meeting with her.
But after that she came up to London to see me, we went to a
hotel together. We arranged to see one another again, but she did
not write. I had now left the university. I heard she was
married.

"It was now four years since I had first had intercourse with a
woman. During this time I was almost continually under the
influence, either of a definite love affair or of a general
lasciviousness and desire for intercourse with women. My
character and life were naturally affected by this. My studies
were interfered with; I had become extravagant and had run into
debt. It is worthy of note that I had never up to this time
considered the desirability of marriage. This was perhaps chiefly
because I had no means to marry. But even in the midst of my
aff