of it,
because such a temper might one day give her trouble. She took the
girl's part. Nevertheless we embraced and it was left so. Soon after,
when I was in the country, this maid, having me no more to vent her
chagrins on behaved in such a manner to my mother-in-law that she could
not bear it. She immediately put her out of doors. I must say here on
my mother-in-law's behalf, that she had both sense and virtue, and
except certain faults, which persons who do not practice prayer are
liable to, she had good qualities. Perhaps I caused crosses to her
without intending it, and she to me without knowing it. I hope what I
write will not be seen by any who may be offended with it, or who may
not be in a condition to see these matters in God.

That gentleman who had used me so ill, for breaking off my acquaintance
with him, among his penitents had one who, for affairs which befell her
husband, was obliged to quit the country. He himself was accused of the
same things which he had so liberally and unjustly accused me, and even
things much worse, and with more noise and outcry. Though I well knew
all this, God granted me the favor never to make his downfall the
subject of my discourse. On the contrary, when any spoke to me of it, I
pitied him, and said what I could in mitigation of his case. And God
governed my heart so well, that it never offered to go into any vain
joy at seeing him overtaken, and oppressed, with those kind of evils
which he had been so assiduous in endeavoring to bring upon me. Though
I knew that my mother-in-law was informed of it all, I never spoke to
her about it, or about the sad confusions he had caused in a certain
family.

CHAPTER 26

One day during my husband's lifetime, laden with sorrow, not knowing
what to do, I wished to speak to a person of distinction, and merit,
who came often into the country. I wrote to request an opportunity with
him, for that I wanted his instruction and advice. But soon after I
felt remorse for it; this voice spoke in my heart, "What,--dost thou
seek for ease, and to shake off my yoke?" Hereupon I instantly sent a
note again to desire him to excuse me, adding that what I had written
was only from self-love, not necessity; that as he knew what it was to
be faithful to God, I hoped he would not disapprove my acting with this
Christian simplicity. Yet he resented it, which surprised me much, as I
had conceived a high idea of his virtue. Virtues he had, but such as