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your tail feathers?" GERMAN EAGLE: "Can you bear the truth, Sire?" KAISER: "If it's not for publication." GERMAN EAGLE: "It's like this, then. You told me the British lion was contemptible. Well--he wasn't!"] What Punch Thinks Is Awaiting the Kaiser [Illustration: (_From Punch, London._)] The Man Behind the Kaiser [Illustration: (_From the Bystander, London._)] Nothing Doing [Illustration: (_From Punch, London._) IMPERIAL DACHSHUND: "Here I've been sitting up and doing tricks for the best part of seven weeks, and you take no more notice of me than if--" UNCLE SAM: "Cut it out!"] As Between Friends [Illustration: (_From Punch, London._) BRITISH LION: "Please don't look at me like that, Sam. _You_'re not the eagle I'm up against."] Kultur [Illustration: (_From The Sketch, London._) Making the German Officers' Mess a Success.] Homers [Illustration: (_From The Sketch, London._) THE POLICEMAN: "What have you got there? Pigeons?" THE ENGLISHMAN (_naturalized_): "No; they vos singing-birds." THE POLICEMAN: "What song do they sing?" THE ENGLISHMAN (_naturalized_): "Home, sveet home."] The New Year's Present That We Are Wishing For [Illustration: (_From La Vie Parisienne, Paris._) A Million English Soldiers to Help Us Drive the Germans from France and Belgium.] "His" Christmas Sabots [Illustration: (_From La Vie Parisienne, Paris._) (The conspicuous place taken by children's stockings at Christmas time in English-speaking countries is usurped by the youngsters' shoes in France.)] "Sire, Your Soup's Getting Cold" [Illustration: (_From La Vie Parisienne, Paris._) How about that famous dinner that the Kaiser ordered in one of the big Paris hotels! Isn't the bill of fare a trifle out of season by this time?] Chaffing the French Censor (_From La Vie Parisienne, Paris._) [Illustration: "At the same instant, happily, a furious gallop resounded along the road from ----, and, full of joy, our Colonel cried: 'They are the ----.' They were, as a matter of fact, the ----."] [Illustration: "Despite this reinforcement, it was hot work. Capt. ---- of the ---- Company of the ---- Regiment especially distinguished himself, leading his men in an irresistible charge. We lost ---- men, but the enemy left ---- dead in the ruins of the village of ----."] [Illustration: "At the end of the ---- ---- victor
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