the chair, and is desirous of knowing
whether the Alderman so situated has been unable to get past the chair
by reason of his obesity.

* * * * *

THE AGRICULTURAL INQUISITION.

Here's Government again at we wi' moor new fangled whims and fancies,
A callin' on us vor to gie a statement of our circumstances;
Now, zince we've got to undergoo this delicate investigation,
O' coorse, my friends, our best we'll do to furnish every information.

We be to zay what land we got--how many acres under tillage--
They seeks to find that out for what?--not surely with intent to
pillage.
They wants the number of our stock, which if we wonders why they axes,
At any rate we knows full well it can't be to lay on moor taxes.

We'm to put down in black-on-white, our cows, and pigs, and ship, and
hosses;
Which them as don't know how to write I s'pose must do by means o'
crosses:
Our wheat, our barley, wuts, and rye, our beans, our hay, and straw
moreover,
Our mangold-wurzel, turmuts, ay, and taters, sainfoin, too, and
clover.

P'raps we shall likewise ha' to state the number of our ploughs and
harrows,
Wheel carriages, both small and great, from carts and waggons down to
barrows,
Machines that to the farm belongs, our clod crushers and scarifiers,
And all our forks, and rakes, and prongs, according as the case
requires.

Our poultry booked they may expect--returns o' turkeys and gallanies,
Along o' lists made out correct o' Bantams, Dorkins, Cochin Chaneys,
And geese and ducks, and pigeons; nay, may be they'll want, a
inventory,
Including all the eggs they lay; a pretty joke and likely story!

How 'twas the project fust arose of sneakin in behind the curtain,
By gettin of us to expose our secrets, I consider certain;
'Tis Popery in the Government that wishes for to get possession
Of our affairs; for which intent they tries to bring us to confession.

We very soon shall find, I fear, the country in a sad condition,
'Tis the beginning, all this here, I take it, of the Inquisition,
You'll shortly see the fagots blaze, unless you stand resolved and
steady;
There's the New Forest, anyways, directed to be cut already.

* * * * *

THE AUSTRALIAN ROUTE.--This route, since the discovery of gold, must be
the Root of Evil.

* * * * *

[Illustr