* * * *

PLATO, GOG, AND MAGOG.

MR. JONES told the Liverymen the other day, that if PLATO were to
revisit the earth to project a new Republic, he would take the theory of
the Corporation of the City of London as his model. Perhaps so. He would
have seen that the theory in question leads to a practical harmony
exhibited in an affection of united minds, amounting to the very love of
the turtle.

* * * * *

PECCADILLOS OF BEAKS.

The unpaid magistracy, so called, have been accused of licensing
public-houses on an arbitrary principle, but it is tolerably certain
that they do not grant any preference without a sufficient
consideration. Unpaid, perhaps these gentlemen ought not to be
denominated; for everybody knows that they pay themselves by the job.

* * * * *

NOT A DOUBT OF IT.--Of all the "tricks upon travellers" which are
practised at our Hotels, by all accounts decidedly the most deceitful
are the Bottle-tricks.

* * * * *

YACHT SIGNALS.

MR. PUNCH has merely to acknowledge a very useful little book, prettily
bound, with the Union Jack (white margin) on its cover, and entitled
"_Supplementary Code of Yacht Signals_." It is not of much use to him in
Fleet Street, but he intends to keep it until the yachting season begins
again, when he will astonish Cowes, Ryde, and "the Island" generally,
with the proficiency he displays in nautical, as in all other exercises.
That the Yacht Club may appreciate the value of the book, _Mr. Punch_
subjoins a page taken at random. Loungers on shore little know what is
meant by the innocent-looking flags which are perpetually being run up
from the _Salmagundi_, the _Olla Podrida_, the _Amontadillo_, and the
other pretty vessels about which they talk so learnedly. Perhaps this
extract may enlighten them:--

Subject. Number Message.
to be
Shewn.

GIRL. 1827. This, with MRS. ST. BROWN (black eyes) has L15,000.
I'd make sail if I were you, old fellow.

---- 1828. (Same, with addition). Quick, for ALGERNON JONES is
making enormous play, and telling awful falsehoods
about his Irish estates.

JEW. 1473. The, has come down. Is at the Pier Hotel. See him,
and do the best you can. I _must_ have L300 in time
for Doncas