There was no knocking at the Dutch Lunches that night.

Every one said the Show was a Bint, but they thought it was up to the
Author to resign from the Baptist Church.

MORAL: In elevating the Drama be sure to get it High enough, even if
you have to make it a trifle Gamey.

THE NEW FABLE OF THE WANDERING BOY AND THE WAYWARD PARENT

Once there was a story-book Stripling who uncoupled himself from a
Yahoo Settlement and moseyed up to the Congested Crossings and the
Electric Signs. In due time he returned, wearing Gloves and with his
Teeth full of Gold.

Ever since that historic Example it has been the daily desire of the
Yokel, staked down in a County Seat, to walk in on Judge Gary and form
a Partnership.

It befell that after a High School Alumnus had gone to a Varsity and
scaled the fearsome heights of Integral and Differential Calculus, he
came home to get some more of Father's Shirts and Handkerchiefs and
take a new Slant at Life's doubtful Vista, while getting his Board for
nothing.

The Town of his Nativity did not occupy many Pages in the statistical
Census Reports. In fact, all the travelling Troupers who had worked
for K. and E. referred to it as a Lime, which is the same as a Lemon,
only smaller.

The ambitious Bachelor of Arts had a lot of Geological Data and College
Fraternity Lore stowed away under his Mortar-Board. His hopes were set
on something more noble than a Chair and a Table and a Blotter in a
dusty Office up the Stairway leading to Odd Fellows' Hall.

So he resolved to hit the long Trail leading to a Modern Babylon where
the Evening papers were on the Streets before Noon.

He figured that a Gazimbat with a John C. Calhoun Forehead and a lot of
inside Dope on Hindoo Anthology could break into almost any Reservoir
of Culture and bring home the Bacon.

Parents were dead willing to have him migrate and take his Tailor Bills
with him, but they shivered with Dread when it came time to ship him to
Gomorrah.

They knew all about the unbridled Deviltry of the City, having seen the
large colored Illustrations in the Sunday Papers.

They had it on good Authority that the whole sub-stratum of Urban
Existence was honeycombed with Rathskellers, while a Prominent Actress
waited on almost every Corner, soliciting Travel on the Taxicab Route
to the everlasting Coke Ovens.

While Elmer's fragile Steamer Trunk was being hoisted into the Dray,
all the Relations who had assisted in bringing hi