every time they were given a chance to hear about it.

Back in the Middle West, Edwin and Selena had been Mountains arising
from the Plain. At all points beyond Greenwich, they were simply two
unconsidered fragments of Foreign Substance.

The Passport did not seem to get them anything. While being walked
upon by the haughty Tea-Drinkers they could not claim the protection
of the American Flag, because they didn't see the Starry Banner after
leaving New York, except in front of a Fake Auction Sale, arranged
especially for Tourists.

By the time they found themselves in that vast bake-oven known as India
they were benumbed and submissive and had settled into a Routine.
They would arrive in a New Town, fly to the Hotel, unpack, go out and
buy their colored Post-Cards, come back to the Dump (usually called the
Grand Hotel Victoria), address Cards to all the Names on the list, then
pack up, pay the Overcharges, and ride to the Railway Station,
accompanied by a small regiment of Bashi-Bazouks who were looking for
Theirs.

The sight of a Temple threw Edwin into a Relapse, but he would have
given $8,000 for one look at the galvanized Cornice of the Court House.
Selena was still buying Souvenirs, but doing it mechanically, as if in
a Trance.

They had been stung with so many Oriental Phoneys and stuck up so often
that they had gone Yellow and lost their Nerve.

When they saw an outstretched Palm, they came across without a Whimper.

Cousin Ella, back among the Corn Fields, pictured them as riding a
caparisoned Elephant up to the marble Palace of the Gackwar of Baroda,
where Edwin would flash his Passport and then the distinguished Guests
would be salaamed to the Peacock Throne.

Nothing like it. They were led up to highly odorous Bazaars conducted
by lineal Descendants of the 40 Thieves.

Often, while riding in the dusty Cattle Cars and looking out at the
parched Plains, they would think of the shaded Front Porch, only 5
minutes from Barclay's Drug Store, where they sold the Ice Cream Soda.
Moaning feebly, they would return to the italicized Guide Book.

The Chow consisted largely of Curry and Rice, the medicinal flavor of
which was further accentuated by Butter brought in Tins all the way
from Sweden.

Although the Heat was intense, they found occasional Relief in sitting
next the Britons and getting a few Zephyrs direct from the Ice-Box.

Each day they would purchase a News-paper about the size of a Bed-Sprea