rls sprinkling Posies, a
Concert Orchestra buried under the Palms, and a few extra Ministers of
the Gospel just to dress the Pulpit.

Every superfluous Accessory devised by the Nerve Specialist and
approved by the Court of Bankruptcy was woven into the Nuptial Circus
when Ferdinand and Adele were made one and Unhookable.

The Rehearsals somewhat resembled the Moving Pictures of the Durbar at
Delhi.

As a final Preparation for the Stupendous Pageant, the Groom sat up all
night in the Dipsomania Club, watching the Head-Liners of the Blue Book
demolish Glassware.

According to the dictates of Fashion, one who is about to assume the
solemn Responsibilities of Matrimony should abstain from Slumber for a
week, devoting the time thus saved to a full consideration of Food and
Drink.

The Ambulance bore his Remains to the Church. A few faithful Hang-
Overs lifted him through the Portals, with his Toes dragging somewhat
in the Rear.

They propped him against a Pilaster and told him his Name and begged
him not to weaken, no matter what the Preacher might put up to him.
Soon after he saw a Haggard Creature all fluffed about with White
advancing unsteadily toward him. With the Make-Up, she did not look a
Day over 47.

He did not hear any of the Service, but those who were more fortunate
told him afterward that it was a very Pretty Wedding, and that they
Presents they got were Simply Great.

MORAL: Too many Trained Nurses discommode Cupid.

THE DREAM THAT CAME OUT WITH MUCH TO BOOT

Once there was a provincial Tradesman who gave his Yokemate a Christmas
Present. It was a kind of Dingus formerly exhibited on the What-Not in
almost every polite Home.

By peering through at the twin Photographs and working it like a Slide
Trombone, one could get ravishing glimpses of Trafalgar Square, Lake
Como, and the Birthplace of Bobby Burns.

Nearly every evening the Tradesman would back up to the Student Lamp
and put in a delirious half-hour with the Views.

While gazing up the Rue de Rivoli or across the rice paddies at the
snowy cap of Fuji, his Blood would become het by the old boyhood Desire
to sail across the Blue to Foreign Parts.

Those who saw him mowing the Lawn little suspected that he was being
inwardly eaten by the Wanderlust.

The Tradesman, Edwin by name, and his Managing Director, Selena, formed
the magic-lantern Habit away back in the days of Stoddard. They never
missed a chance to take in Burton Holmes.