l the truth; and I read it in all the jarnals;
I did, upon my soul. Why man, it's history now, if such nasty mean doins
is worth puttin' into a book.

"What makes this Spy System to England wuss, is that these
eaves-droppers are obliged to hear all that's said, or lose what
commission they hold; at least so folks tell me. I recollect when I was
there last, for it's some years since Government first sot up the Spy
System; there was a great feed given to a Mr. Robe, or Robie, or some
such name, an out and out Tory. Well, sunthin' or another was said over
their cups, that might as well have been let alone, I do suppose, tho'
dear me, what is the use of wine but to onloosen the tongue, and what
is the use of the tongue, but to talk. Oh, cuss 'em, I have no patience
with them. Well, there was an officer of a marchin' regiment there, who
it seems ought to have took down the words and sent 'em up to the head
Gineral, but he was a knowin' coon, was officer, and _didn't hear it_.
No sooner said than done; some one else did the dirty work for him; but
you can't have a substitute for this, you must sarve in person, so the
old Gineral hawls him right up for it.

"'Why the plague, didn't you make a fuss?' sais the General, 'why didn't
you get right up, and break up the party?'

"'I didn't hear it,' sais he.

"'You didn't hear it!' sais Old Sword-belt, 'then you had ought to have
heerd it; and for two pins, I'd sharpen your hearin' for you, so that a
snore of a fly would wake you up, as if a byler had bust.'

"Oh, how it has lowered the English in the eyes of foreigners! How
sneakin' it makes 'em look! They seem for all the world like scared
dogs; and a dog when he slopes off with his head down, his tail atween
his legs, and his back so mean it won't bristle, is a caution to
sinners. Lord. I wish I was Queen!"

"What, of such a degraded race as you say the English are, of such a
mean-spirited, sneaking nation?"

"Well, they warn't always so," he replied. "I will say that, for I
have no prejudice. By natur, there is sunthin' noble and manly in a
Britisher, and always was, till this cussed Spy System got into fashion.
They tell me it was the Liberals first brought it into vogue. How that
is. I don't know; but I shouldn't wonder if it was them, for I know
this, if a feller talks _very_ liberal in politics, put him into office,
and see what a tyrant he'll make. If he talks very liberal in religion,
it's because he hante got none