t time I seed 'em
it put me in mind of what happened to me at New Brunswick once. Governor
of Maine sent me over to their Governor's, official-like, with a state
letter, and the British officers axed me to dine to their mess. Well,
the English brags so like niggers, I thought I'd prove 'em, and set 'em
off on their old trade jist for fun. So, says I, stranger captain, sais
I, is all these forks and spoons, and plates and covers, and urns,
and what nots, rael genu_wine_ solid silver, the clear thing, and no
mistake. 'Sartainly,' said he, 'we have nothin' but silver here.' He
did, upon my soul, just as cool, as if it was all true; well you can't
tell a mili_tary_ what he sais ain't credible, or you have to fight
him. It's considered ongenteel, so I jist puts my finger on my nose, and
winks, as much as to say, 'I ain't such a cussed fool as you take me to
be, I can tell you.'

"When he seed I'd found him out, he larfed like any thing. Guess he
found that was no go, for I warn't born in the woods to be scared by
an owl, that's a fact. Well, the fust time I went to lord's party, I
thought it was another brag agin; I never see nothin' like it. Heavens
and airth, I most jumpt out o' my skin. Where onder the sun, sais I to
myself, did he rake and scrape together such super-superior galls as
these. This party is a kind o' consarvitory, he has got all the raree
plants and sweetest roses in England here, and must have ransacked the
whole country for 'em. Knowin' I was a judge of woman kind, he wants me
to think they are all this way; but it's onpossible. They are only
"shew frigates" arter all; it don't stand to reason, they can't be all
clippers. He can't put the leake into me that way, so it tante no
use tryin'. Well, the next time, I seed jist such another covey of
partridges, same plumage, same step, and same breed. Well done, sais I,
they are intarmed to pull the wool over my eyes, that's a fact, but they
won't find that no easy matter, I know. Guess they must be done now,
they can't show another presarve like them agin in all Britain. What
trouble they do take to brag here, don't they? Well, to make a long
story short; how do you think it eventuated, Squire? Why every party I
went to, had as grand a shew as them, only some on 'em was better, fact
I assure you, it's gospel truth; there ain't a word of a lie in it,
text to the letter. I never see nothin' like it, since I was raised, nor
dreamed nothin' like it, and what's more