he mails.'
"'No,' he'll say, 'not now; we have jist sent an English one over, for
we find it's a good thing that.'
"'One word more,' sais you, 'and I have done. If your army officers out
there, get leave of absence, do you stop their pay?'
"'No.'
"'Do you sarve native colonists the same way?'
"'No, we stop half their salaries.'
"'Exactly,' sais you, 'make them feel the difference. Always make a
nigger feel he is a nigger, or he'll get sassy, you may depend. As for
patronage,' sais you, 'you know as well as I do, that all that's
not worth havin', is jist left to poor colonist. He is an officer of
militia, gets no pay and finds his own fit out. Like Don Quixote's
tailor, he works for nothin' and finds thread. Any other little matters
of the same kind, that nobody wants, and nobody else will take; if
Blue-nose makes interest for, and has good luck, he can get as a great
favour, to conciliate his countrymen. No, Minister,' sais you, 'you are
a clever man, every body sais you are a brick; and if you ain't, you
talk more like one, than any body I have seen this while past. I don't
want no office myself, if I did p'raps, I wouldn't talk about patronage
this way; but I am a colonist, I want to see the colonists remain so.
They _are_ attached to England, that is a fact, keep them so, by making
them Englishmen. Throw the door wide open; patronise them; enlist them
in the imperial sarvice, allow them a chance to contend for honours and
let them win them, if they can. If they don't, it's their own fault, and
cuss 'em they ought to be kicked, for if they ain't too lazy, there is
no mistake in 'em, that's a fact. The country will be proud of them, if
they go ahead. Their language will change then. It will be _our_ army,
the delighted critters will say, not the English army; _our_ navy, _our_
church, _our_ parliament, _our_ aristocracy, &c., and the word English
will be left out holus-bolus, and that proud, that endearin' word
"our" will be insarted. Do this, and you will shew yourself the first
statesman of modern times. You'll rise right up to the top of the pot,
you'll go clean over Peel's head, as your folks go over ourn, not by
jumpin' over him, but by takin' him by the neck and squeezin' him
down. You 'mancipated the blacks, now liberate the colonists and make
Englishmen of them, and see whether the goneys won't grin from ear to
ear, and shew their teeth, as well as the niggers did. Don't let
Yankee clockmakers, (yo
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