SEPH AND POTIPHAR'S WIFE.

A DUTCH boy, being asked why Joseph would not sleep with Potiphar's
wife, replied, after considerable hesitation, "_I schpose he vash not
schleepy_."

SHE DIDN'T TAKE ANY.

A LITTLE girl, after returning from church, where she saw a collection
taken up for the first time, related what took place, and, among other
things, she said, with all her childish innocence, "That a man passed
round a plate that had some money on it, _but she didn't take any_."

DEFINITIONS.

A LADY walking with her husband on the beach, inquired of him, the
difference between exportation and transportation. "Why, my dear,"
replied he, "if you were on board yonder vessel, you would be
_exported_, and I should be _transported_."

CHANCERY.

EVERY animal has its enemies; the land tortoise has two enemies--man and
the boa constrictor. Man takes him home and roasts him; and the boa
constrictor swallows him whole, shell and all, and consumes him slowly
in the interior, _as the Court of Chancery does a great
estate_.--_Sydney Smith._

SMART UNS.

FIRST class in astronomy, stand up. "Where does the sun rise?" "Please,
sir, down in our meadow; I seed it yesterday!" "Hold your tongue, you
dunce; where does the sun rise?" "I know--in the east!" "Right, and why
does it rise in the east?" "Because the _'east_ makes _everything_
rise." "Out, you booby!"

MRS. PARTINGTON.

MRS. PARTINGTON lately remarked to a legal friend: "If I owes a man a
debt, and makes him the lawless tenant of a blank bill, and he infuses
to incept it, but swears out an execration and levels it upon my body,
if I wouldn't make a pollywog of him drown me in the Nuxwine sea."

TO THOSE ABOUT TO GO TO LAW.

TO him that goes to law, nine things are requisite:--1st, a good deal of
money; 2nd, a good deal of patience; 3rd, a good cause; 4th, a good
attorney; 5th, a good counsel; 6th, good evidence; 7th, a good jury;
8th, a good judge; 9th, good luck. Even with all these, a wise man
should hesitate before going to law.

ERROR CORRECTED.

THE Rev. Sydney Smith, preaching a charity sermon, frequently repeated
the assertion that, of all nations, Englishmen were the most
distinguished for generosity and the love of their species. The
collection happened to be inferior to his expectations, and he said that
he had evidently made a great mistake, for that his expression should
have been, that they w