is not considered a sport
because it does not involve killing anything. This is but one more
example of Continental aspersion.

* * * * *

As a result of his trip over the Gordon-Bennett course, the Roman
Catholic Archbishop of Dublin now recommends the motor-car for pastoral
visits. This will be no new thing. For years past some people have
looked on the motor-car in the light of a visitation.

* * * * *

CYCLING CONUNDRUM.--_Q._ What article of the cyclist girl's attire do a
couple of careless barbers recall to mind?

_A._ A pair of nickers.

* * * * *

Motorists are still expressing their indignation at a recent disgraceful
incident when one of their number, because he could not pay a fine at
once, was taken to prison, and forced to don ugly convict garb in the
place of his becoming goggles and motor coat.

* * * * *

Illustration: _Engineer._ "There's certainly a screw loose somewhere."

_Simple Simon_ (_with gleeful satisfaction_). "He-he! I knaws where 't
be too!"

_Car Owner_ (_intensely interested_). "What do you mean, boy?"

_Simple Simon._ "He-he! Why I've got 'un! All the folks say as 'ow I've
got a screw loose somewheres!"

* * * * *

WHEELS WITHIN WHEELS

_Dialogue between two Young Gentlemen, dressed in Knickerbocker
Suits, Gaiters, and Golf caps. They have the indescribable air which
proclaims the votary of the "Bike"._

_First Young Gentleman._ Yes; I certainly agree with the French view of
it. Cycling shouldn't be indulged in without care.

_Second Y. G._ They say in Paris that no one should become an habitual
cyclist without "medical authorisation."

_First Y. G._ Yes. Quite right. Then, when you are permitted, you ought
to travel at a moderate pace. About five miles an hour is quite enough
for a beginner.

_Second Y. G._ Enough! Why, too much! You can't be too careful! Then, if
you break off for a time, you ought to begin all over again. You should
"gradually acquire speed"; not rush at it!

_First Y. G._ Certainly. I read in the _Lancet_ only the other day that
merely increasing the pace of a bike a couple of miles an hour was
sufficient to send up the normal pulse to 150!

_Second Y. G._ Most alarming! And yet I can see from your costume you
are a cyclist.

_First Y. G._ Not at all. I am pleased with the co