r. "I'm astounded to meet you! I just
come to New York to-day, but if I'd of knowed you was here, I'd of been
here long ago. However, I'm here now and better late than forever, as
the feller says. I just bet my cousin here that the first thing I
tried my hand at in New York I'd make good. I'm goin' out to-morrow
and show him how easy it is for a feller to get to the top in this here
prize rube burg, provided he has now gumption and his methods is new.
I'll see you to-morrow night and let you know how I made out; I know
you won't have no peace till you hear about it!" He digs into his
pockets feverishly and grabs out a handful of letters. "Here's what
they thought of me up in Vermont!" he goes on, never takin' his eyes
off the girl's face. The wife is starin' at him with her mouth and
eyes as open as a crap tourney, like she figured he'd gone nutty--and
me and Little Eva is runnin' neck and neck at tryin' to keep from
laughin'. "They say a man that can make good in New York can make good
anywhere," he goes on, throwin' the clutch into high again. "_I_ say a
man that can make good anywhere can make good in New York! What's the
difference between New York and Goose Creek, Iowa?--New York's got more
people in it, that's all! It's harder--"

"Alex, Alex!" butts in the wife, finally regainin' control of her
voice. "What is the matter with you? You--"

"Hush!" says Alex, turnin' back to Eve again. "It's harder to make
good in a little town than it is in a big one, because--"

"Alex, look here!" cuts in the wife, gettin' sore. "Miss Rossiter
ain't interested in that patter of yours--we're goin' to the theatre.
Now both you men run along and dress, we'll miss half the show as it
is!"

"I'll be right back!" chirps Alex to Eve. "Them eyes of yours is
simply now dumfoundin'!"

I took Alex in my boudoir and while I'm gettin' in the banquet
uneyform, he takes a thing that was a cross between a tuxedo and a
dress suit out of his bag and dolls up. When set for the street, Alex
was no Greek god, but he was fairly easy to look at, if you closed one
eye. He wanted to know what kind of an entertainment they had at the
opry house this week, and I told him I'd show him somethin' that had
them huskin' bees, he was used to up in Vermont, beat eighty ways from
the jack.

Well, we go to the biggest musical show on Broadway, and instead of
faintin' dead away from joy, Alex claims it was rotten and spent the
night explai