. It was
the first check for fifty thousand bucks I ever seen in my life and it
was signed by the secretary of the U. S. treasury!

"Why--what kinda stuff is this?" mutters Hector, turnin' the check over
and over. "It's made out to me! Why--who--where--who give you--"

"It's all yours!" says Alex, rubbin' his hands together and displayin'
all his back teeth. "I took your food to Washington and got the
government experts to try it out. They been lookin' for a one-piece
ration for the army. They wanted somethin' cheap, palatable and
nourishin' that the men would take to. They was after a food that
could be easily packed and shipped. They give your food every possible
test and accepted it. That fifty thousand is only a first payment--we
still got four hundred and fifty thousand comin' for the invention
and--"

"My Gawd!" gasps Hector. "They give up all this money for that?"

"Sure!" rattles on Alex. "And all you gotta do is go to the laboratory
they're gonna build and show 'em how to make it. We still got four
hundred and--"

"Where d'ye get that _we_ stuff?" I butts in, seein' my bet with Alex
goin' south. "Hector put that over and--"

"And I put _him_ over!" says Alex. "I'm the young feller that showed
him where _his_ ace was! I therefore take one thousand dollars from
you, with that weddin' chest of silver, and I'll only charge Hector ten
per cent of his profits, as he was my first patient. I--"

"Let's git outa here!" pipes Hector hoarsely. "Think of me with fifty
thousand berries and more on the fire!"

Well, we all met at the flat the next afternoon to celebrate. The wife
suggested a theatre party with all that goes with it, and I was lookin'
over the papers to pick out a good show. Alex is walkin' up and down
the room, rubbin' them hands of his together.

"Well, well, well!" he says, slappin' Hector on the back. "To think
that the days of slavery is all over! No more reportin' at the ball
park every day, no more spring training no more watchin' 'em hit and
run. That must be great after seven years of havin' to see it and--"

"Yeh!" mumbles Hector, kinda glum. He's all dressed up like a broken
arm and takin' it just as hard.

"Well," I says, "where will we go? We got all the shows in New York to
pick from and--"

"Get one that will give Mister Sells a chance to really relax and enjoy
himself," says the wife. "Somethin' that will allow him to forget his
former--"

"Why not ask