gara Falls," I says.

"Both of them are jealous," says the wife. "I'm surprised at Alex
saying that any one could act as well as Carrington De Vire. Why, I
think he's got Faversham beaten a mile. You have to be born with
talent like that!"

"I think the wife's right in one thing at last," I says. "I like them
male movie heroes and carbolic acid the same way, but you got to hand
it to this bird--he's _some_ actor! Yep, Alex, you can't learn that
stuff out of no book, you gotta be born with it."

"You're all crazy!" announces Alex, with another snort. "I can go out
right now and dig up a dozen fellers which never seen a camera in their
life and they'll duplicate anything Carrington De Vire ever did on a
screen. Where does he get off to be wonderful? Some feller with
brains writes a play, another feller with money puts it on and then
another feller with technical knowledge tells De Vire, which ain't got
none of them things, where to stand and the like while he acts it.
Why--"

"Ridiculous!" butts in Eve. "Carrington De Vire has extraordinary
talent. He has thousands of admirers all over the country.
Why--why--he's famous!"

"Of course," says the wife. "It's too silly to talk about. Alex has
reached the stage now where he thinks he can do anything!"

"Yeh?" says Alex. "Well, I reached the stage where I thought I could
do anything about three minutes after I was born! I'll bet right now I
can go down to the docks or some place and get a handsome stevedore and
make him as big a star as Carrington De Vire in six months!"

"Don't be idiotic," laughs Eve. "Imagine a stevedore as a moving
picture star!"

"Why not?" demands Alex, lookin' like the idea had made a hit with him.
"Ain't a stevedore as good as anybody else? I'll bet a thousand
dollars even that I can catch one or somebody like him and make him a
movie star. What d'ye say?"

"I'll say this," I says. "We come here to see this picture and not to
hear you make a speech. This here's a theatre and not no race track
and forget about that bettin' thing. If you can make a movie star out
of a stevedore, I can make a watch outa a hard boiled egg!"

They is some people behind us which can't see the picture on account of
us talkin' and they begin to hiss at us. It bothers Alex the same as
rain worries a duck.

"Is they steam escapin' somewheres?" he remarks, turnin' his head.
"Why, brakemen have became railroad presidents," he goes on,
"bootblack