provocation at all. We only wish some one would provoke somebody
else to write an original play, by writing one first himself.

* * * * *

THE GOLDEN AGE OF LIFE.--Youth is the season for active exertion; and
all those who emigrate to the Diggings ought to be Minors.

* * * * *

[Illustration: RURAL SIMPLICITY.

_Legal Gentleman._ "HM! NOT A BAD GLASS OF PORT FOR A COUNTRY INN."

_Boots._ "NOA, ZUR, I THINKS THEY MEAKES THUR OWN WINE HERE. I _KNAW_
THEY BREE-EWS."]

* * * * *

[Illustration: IN A VERY BAD WAY.

"WHY, YOU SEEM QUITE WRETCHED, FRANK!"

"WETCHED, MY BOY! AH, YOU MAY IMAGINE HOW WETCHED I AM, WHEN I TELL YOU
I DON'T EVEN CARE HOW MY TWOWSERS ARE MADE!"]

* * * * *

THE CAB QUESTION IN A NEW LIGHT.

Dirty carriage--wretched horse,
Driver insolent and coarse;
Prompt with ruffianly air
To extort a double fare.
If your rights you would maintain,
And to Magistrate complain,
Bullied by a Counsel brought
To abuse you in the Court,
For the dirty business paid
By the union of the trade,
Who can penalties afford
From results of frequent fraud--
Gentle Public, if you'd shun
Fifty nuisances in one,
Write it down on memory's slab,
"Never take a London Cab!"

Gentle Public, come with me,
And another picture see.
Handsome carriage--decent horse--
Driver neither rude nor coarse;
For the same as Cabman's fare,
Prompt to take you anywhere.
If appearance you'd maintain,
There's no reason to complain;
To your door the Clarence brought,
Fit to drive you, e'en to Court.
Gentle Public, tell me why
Don't you patronise a Fly?

* * * * *

CHURCH CANNONS.

A DR. CHURCH has invented some pieces of artillery which load at the
breech; and two of them have been tried at Woolwich with perfect
success. In these days, when ecclesiastical authority is so greatly at a
discount, we are glad to recognise a CHURCH whose cannons are a hit. We
believe that these cannons cost much less than the average of cathedral
dignitaries.

* * * * *

CHRISTMAS PRESENCE.

_Presence of Matter._ In the Court of Common Council.

_Presence of Mind._ In _Punch's Almanack!_

* * * * *

THE HANWELL COOKERY BOOK.

So much progress has been made in that hu